This “Piece of Cloth” is the most Apple thing Apple has ever Apple’d. Introducing: The Apple Sock (2025 Edition). A revolutionary breakthrough in fabric-based containment technology. Born from the radical idea that devices deserve clothes too, Apple presents: A Piece of Cloth. Crafted in Japan. Inspired by the concept of “cloth.” Because when you think “innovation,” you think textile. Features: A Material Revelation: It’s… a sock. But not just any sock, a sock for your device. Because regular socks are for peasants. Minimalism Reimagined: No zippers. No buttons. Just vibes and a $149.95 price tag. A Pocket, Reborn: Inspired by “the idea of an additional pocket,” this sock boldly asks: what if pockets had pockets? Two Strap Designs: Short Strap: For when you want to feel frugal at $149.95. Long Strap: For people who like their accessories to cost as much as an iPhone SE. Colors: Eight short strap colors, three long, because scarcity drives desire. And yes, they have names like “Moon Whisper,” “Storm Ecru,” and “Pacific Beige #2.” Designed by Yoshiyuki Miyamae. Say it five times fast while holding your breath and justifying your preorder. Availability: Only in select Apple Stores and only in countries where irony can be appreciated. Marketing Tagline: “Not just a sock. A statement.” Early Reviews: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “Finally, my iPhone feels… clothed.” Someone with too much disposable income. ⭐️⭐️⭐️ “It’s like a $5 microfiber pouch, but with the weight of Apple’s self-importance.” - Tech reviewer, sobbing quietly. If Apple keeps this up, by 2030 we’ll have the Apple Napkin Pro Max Ultra, featuring “the revolutionary ability to absorb liquid” and a USB-C port.