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You all pretty much know I lost my husband and I can't/won't move on. However the idea of spending the rest of my life alone is depressing at best. Then there's the dating pool of men I have access to and that leads to more depression. I'm 37. By the time I'm ready for a new guy I'll be in my early 40s. I had kids in my 20s, I was a happy housewife. I did what I was supposed to do and I'm probably going to die alone anyway. When my elders told me life isn't fair they weren't joking. Life is a big joke, on me. I hate my life.

You all pretty much know I lost my husband and I can't/won't move on. However the idea of spending the rest of my life alone is depressing at best. Then there's the dating pool of men I have access to and that leads to more depression. I'm 37. By the time I'm ready for a new guy I'll be in my early 40s. I had kids in my 20s, I was a happy housewife. I did what I was supposed to do and I'm probably going to die alone anyway. When my elders told me life isn't fair they weren't joking. Life is a big joke, on me. I hate my life.

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[–] 0 pt

There's no reason why a guy wouldn't relocate to you, as BurnInHelena pointed out there's the same number of single guys out there who suck at finding the right person.

Men tend to be pretty self sufficient and may be disillusioned with online dating, so figure out the kind of guy you like and then work out where they are probably hanging out.

As hopefully a useful suggestion, "meatlady" maybe isn't the kind of forum name that says 'feminine'? so you may be doing yourself a disservice here.

Online dating is a numbers game, you have to be out there to get noticed. Beyond that, while you are outside of a relationship, have a look at any personal baggage that might affect a future relationship, maybe learn some new conversational/empathy skills. Because beyond looks, men really want someone to understand them. There's a bit of a learning curve going from widowed to back into dating, so relearning how to talk to guys will put you way ahead of all the "save me from my poor life decisions" types

That's some sage advice there, wet pussy :)

I will have to disagree on the relocation thing though, a dude would have to be pretty desperate to quit a job, sell their house, leave their network of friends and acquaintances just because they feel lonely on some weeknights. Then there's trivial shit like favorite fishing/hunting spots, hiking trails, etc. Then the covaids thing, I doubt anyone would want to leave a mask free state and move to a mandatory mask state because they're lonely and are willing to settle for a broad with children and yuppy purse dogs. If they are that desperate, that's kind of a red flag right there.

100% agree with all your other points though.

[–] 0 pt

I will have to disagree on the relocation thing though

There's at least one lady I would drop everything for and just move, other than that I'm not really looking for anyone. Men find it easier to relocate, we have a bunch of skills and can deal with the hassle of making that happen. And to be fair, plenty of Asian/Russian woman do the same to end up in the West

Like meatlady pointed out, sometimes you get stick in the middle of nowhere and there's nobody you like, the way out of that is to look further afield, and 100 miles is much the same as a 1,000 as you'd have to move anyway.

I don't know where she's is now, but if someone was already in Idaho then that's a big plus

[–] [deleted] 0 pt (edited )

Yeah if I was to start looking for another woman it would be in Russia/Ukraine. I'm a widower and I still miss my wife terribly. I understand at some point I will have to move on and it's probably easier for males than females.

At the same time it would be hard to let go of the place where I went through my grieving process, it would be like leaving a "support group" of sorts, you know? I'm just so settled in my routine with my kids, work, friends, neighbors that it would feel like getting a divorce of sorts..

And it's really not a "middle of nowhere" if you have kids, they find a way to make you fit into the community and challenge you regardless of how smart you think you are, I hardly have time to think of getting a woman just dealing with my kids shenanigans lol.

I understand @meatlady, believe me, but at this point she has nothing else to offer to our race, she should be fine and dandy hooking up with whoever she likes as long as SHE is happy. It may sound callous, but that is reality imo.

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