An introductory "about the author" sleeve in his new book makes me think my copy was tampered with. *Mike Pence was born and raised in Columbus, Indiana in the family mini van, behind a Mary Brown's family chicken restaurant. The mini van was discovered by shiftleader Shyquan'Monte Delorian Bartholomew the Third Junior Nindando Supa Control Sixty Fo who received a key to the city and promotion to the day shift and no fryer or cash register duties as well as a trophy. Mike is the younger brother of professional fluffer Greg Pence. He was born when his father Corky Pence squirted his dingleberry in an unplanned ejaculatory strike on his mother Fannie Pence's cottage cheese vage. He graduated from Gerkin College and earned a degree from the Ballsack University School of Dong before entering private practice as a public masturbator and defecator using his oral cavity.*