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I was getting on the bus after going to the gym and grocery shopping last Saturday. I looked around, same miserable crowd of niggers and chinks two white kids in suits smiling at me??? I made brief eye contact with on of them, and that was all it took.

Do you want to come to church with us on Sunday?!?

The way he said it was endearing: halfway between a nervous teenager asking his crush out to prom, and a novice used-car salesman excited for his first deal, earnest and sincere and hopeful before the world has extinguished his optimism.

I responded to their positivity with a reflexive yes; these seem like good, brave people, especially attempting to spread the good word on a bus packed with dangerous SEPTA juveniles, half of whom were wearing shiesties.

It only took another moment for me to put two and two together. These were Mormons. Not sure how I feel about that, but they seemed happy. That matters a lot when you are trying to find a cult to join.

They asked for my phone number to text me the location of their "South Philly Congregation", which is actually in Center City. A little further than I'd like to go, but I said yes, so I will go.

Kind of forgot about it after that, but they have been calling me to pray with me after that. They even called me with a token south Philly Guido they had converted back in 1997, his name was Eldor Joey Moretti or some whop shit like that. But it was kind if endearing, they opened and closed every call with a prayer.

So now I must go to the LDS church on Sunday. Will they get to me? Or will another cult find me first? I think my AA sponsor is in a cult too, I haven't told him about the mormons yet. I wonder what he will say about that.

I was getting on the bus after going to the gym and grocery shopping last Saturday. I looked around, same miserable crowd of ~~niggers and chinks~~ two white kids in suits smiling at me??? I made brief eye contact with on of them, and that was all it took. >Do you want to come to church with us on Sunday?!? The way he said it was endearing: halfway between a nervous teenager asking his crush out to prom, and a novice used-car salesman excited for his first deal, earnest and sincere and hopeful before the world has extinguished his optimism. I responded to their positivity with a reflexive yes; these seem like good, brave people, especially attempting to spread the good word on a bus packed with dangerous SEPTA juveniles, half of whom were wearing shiesties. It only took another moment for me to put two and two together. These were Mormons. Not sure how I feel about that, but they seemed happy. That matters a lot when you are trying to find a cult to join. They asked for my phone number to text me the location of their "South Philly Congregation", which is actually in Center City. A little further than I'd like to go, but I said yes, so I will go. Kind of forgot about it after that, but they have been calling me to pray with me after that. They even called me with a token south Philly Guido they had converted back in 1997, his name was Eldor Joey Moretti or some whop shit like that. But it was kind if endearing, they opened and closed every call with a prayer. So now I must go to the LDS church on Sunday. Will they get to me? Or will another cult find me first? I think my AA sponsor is in a cult too, I haven't told him about the mormons yet. I wonder what he will say about that.

(post is archived)

[–] • 6 pts (edited )

LDS isn’t Christian. It’s a jew grift cult invented by a conman looking to get rich and fuck kids that denies the deity of Jesus Christ.

Also, the term is wop, based on the immigration classification of many illiterate Italians at the turn of the 20th century: WithOut Papers (WOP).

[–] • 2 pts

Yeah, most churches are cults and perversions of the word of Christ, I am aware of this.

And I live amongst the wops, they are a funny people.

[–] • 1 pt

You can always use the block function on your phone. Mormons are different. Not Christian as such.

[–] • 1 pt

If Italians are Wops, these spics should be called Nits. (No identificación tengo) and you know what they say... nits make lice.

[–] • 2 pts

Do you have a no trespassing sign in your Minecraft house and do you have the right equipment to defend it from the potential hordes of zombies?

[–] • 2 pts

Maybe use this as an opportunity to redpill some of them about the JQ.

[–] • 2 pts

AA is a cult, so, yeah, your sponsor is in a cult. If you had a problem, then I am glad AA can help you, but after you learn the program, I don't think the lifelong cult membership is required. As for the mormon, they aren't Christian. Go find a proper church. Here's a list I would recommend (obviously skip the Korean ones.) https://www.phillypca.com/churches

PCA is essentially Puritan theology, so no rock bands, stage lighting, stained glass, all that shit. It's nerd church where you just pray, sing hymns, and learn what the bible says (not the fad of the week.)

[–] • 0 pt

Why do you think AA is a cult?

[–] • 1 pt

Targets vulnerable people, hides its religious basis, requires frequent meetings, demands life long membership, strict moral code, constant behavior accounting. As far as cults go, it's not destructive (and likely is very helpful for a lot of people.) FWIW, I mean cult as a term of art, not as a derogative. I consider all religious denominations to be cults (and am in the Presbyterian cult.)

[–] • 1 pt

So, for me, it is kind of a semantics problem, and answer depends wildly on how you define cult.

I dont think it is a cult, mostly because cult implies some sort of predatory power structure that AA does not have. But again, this is a problem of semantics, but when I think cult I think of an organization that is predatory in a financial sense and has a very clear, defined hierarchy with and internal elite exposed to the esoteric dogma while the masses of joiners just get the exoteric teachings.

[–] • 0 pt

in the classic definition of a cult, AA misses the mark by one. They do not ask for money, so close but no cigar.

[–] • 2 pts

That's referred to as "friendshipping". Mormons are trained to basically smother people in kindness to get them into their church system.

Doesn't make them bad people but it's almost a cult brainwashing technique.

[–] • 2 pts

I'll take a lil friendly brainwashing, just for the lulz, maybe try edge it a little, see how far I can go without going in.

But their beliefs are retarded and they practice tithing, which is a hard pass for Theo.

[–] • 2 pts

What? You don't like ancient aliens dropping souls into volcanos?

[–] • 1 pt

When I was a kid, I actually had a scientologist offer me a free e-reading at the train station after school. He said my levels were all fucked up and I was probably retarded. He offered to take me back to the headquarters to get a more in-depth reading.

I wonder where I would be now if I had gone with him.

[–] • 1 pt

People don't think it be like that, but it do.

[–] • 1 pt

I'm sure your time is more valuable than this.

Instead of going to the cult meeting, you could go and spend time in the nature away from all the noise.

[–] • 2 pts

Cult meeting is closer. Also for work, a the stuff I deal with goes to SLC and Utah, understanding Mormons a little better couldnt hurt.

[–] • 4 pts

So Poal is officially infiltrating the Mormons.

[–] • 3 pts

I am also moving this weekend (finally out the sober house!!!), I feel like if I work that in after the service is done I can probably get a couple young missionaries to volunteer to help.

[–] • 1 pt

Yes. They will get to you. They are relentless and they won't quit unless you never go back, but I suggest you go, just for the observational experiment. They call themselves "brother" and "sister" (fill in the blank) when addressing males and females.

Years ago, I attended nine different denomination as a social experiment, just to see what I could see. All I saw was division and cult-like behavior from all of them.

At the end of your service with them, the heads of the church may approach you too. They all know who the newcomers are and they will approach you and begin asking questions. If you can't take that, then don't go. But, if you can take it and stand up for yourself, do it. Then, never return.

[–] • 2 pts

I just want to see it out of curiosity. I don't cave to peer pressure and I have a thorough understanding of sales/conversion tactics, so I am not worried that I will be uncomfortable. Also due to my job, I have to talk to a lot of people around SLC and Utah in general, understanding the Mormons a little better cant hurt.

[–] • 1 pt

I was approached over the summer. Still wanna read the book of Mormon