Most of my stupid shit that could have killed me involved driving too fast.

I liked to drive fast , and usually under the influence of booze , weed , and for a brief time , cocaine ( it was the 80s after all ). Saints be praised I never crashed or injured anyone.

I also fought niggers frequently , no choice really , did get stabbed for my trouble once.

"I bet you won't, pussy."

I mean. Being a boy in the US pre 2000.

Because

No better reason.

Mom in tears, literally red with worry asks you "Why did you do that though? It's so dangerous!!!!"

Well mom, because.

Dad sitting on the couch stifles a chuckle.

When I was 13 or something, with a friend we were bored during the afternoon, his parents weren't there, and we decided to make a giant water bomb, with a sport bag, and there was like 10 liters of water in it, and we added little cars, marbles, and chinese chopsticks for good measure. Then my friend threw it out of the window. He lived at the 5th floor of a parisian building... It landed right on a car parked near by, the car "exploded", fucking bent, and we were oh shit oh fuck and we closed the windows fast and ran in his room. Then we started playing some shit, and then his father came home. And he was fucking dark mad, and he said, "floriant, what is this..." while holding a marble between his fingers... And floriant my firend said "Well, it's a marble?" and then his father said "floriant, there's a guy downstairs, crying near his completely destroyed car..." and floriant said "I swear dad I know nothing!"and his father said to me "you... You take your stuffs, and you get the fuck out..."

Later... Our parents decided it was better we never meet ever again...

LOL

Cell towers at night out in the boonies south of Chicago, close enough to see the skyline if it was clear weather. Take up a few beers an find a perch.

There was an old candy cane striped metal playground abandoned in my neighborhood. It was completely overgrown but still useable. We would ride the swings all the way up into the tree line and jump off at the very top, hoping to end up in the tree branches. After an hour or so most kids would make the jump and we could climb to the very top of the trees.

I can't tell you his many broken bones and er trips our parents had to make. We constantly assured them that weren't playing at the old playground in the woods.

Me and my brothers decided to build a plane out of our wagon one day 2X4's and wood paneling...looked good enough. grandmother left at 11am everyday in her truck to head to town, so we tied a long rope to her bumper and around the frame of the wagon and waited. she came out and started the truck. we rushed the wagon in place and the middle brother ( he was the lightest of all three) got on the wagon, and we handed him the other end of the rope so he could pull it, and the knot would release the wagon. the road to our house was a long straight road down to the highway and at the end he was supposed to pull the rope and release the wagon. granny took off and we followed on our bikes. the wings were twisting in the wind not rising an inch when she stopped at the intersection and took off again. brother was pulling the rope as hard as he could, but would not release. we lost sight of him on the highway for a bit, until we came around a curve and saw him pulling the wagon coming our way, covered in mud and stick-tights from the ditch he rolled to a stop in. the plastic bearings had melted and were smoking from friction and one of the wheels had lost the rubber tire off the rim. he wasn't injured, so we hurried home and waited until she pulled back up in the driveway....i distracted her while my brother untied the rope and we swore each other to not say a word about the incident.

Yeah, if you grew up prior to this snowflake bullshit, you probably fit the sentiment that i had once i hit my 20's

"the fact that there is a single boy that survived past 18 is proof of a deity, and that he's VERY BUSY" lol

because, exactly as you said, "i bet you won't... pussy"

"youre weak if you dont" is what started most trips to the doctor. i survived and i am a stronger and wiser man for it

Liked to climb trees a lot.

Should get into tree trimming as a hobby or something. Don't much care for saws though.