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He's an alcoholic, he has stage 4 brain cancer in remission. For some reason, every time i call him, he always says he's going to the liquor store, or going to a bar, or going out for drinks with coworkers. Every. Single. Time. Without fail, it's just yet another excuse to go drink. And at some point I felt it was funny. But now i feel incredibly sad, i almost cried today, because i feel like im somehow responsible for this. I dont know how, and maybe im not.

Our mom was incredibly abusive towards us in our young age, and he never was able to shake off the mean things she said. She once complained she should have aborted us for being terrible children. I feel like his destructive behaviors, will just cause a much more pronounced and fast death at this point. It's only a matter of time, before i get that phone call and hear the painful words that he passed away. And yet, it feels like all i can do is just watch from the distance

He's an alcoholic, he has stage 4 brain cancer in remission. For some reason, every time i call him, he always says he's going to the liquor store, or going to a bar, or going out for drinks with coworkers. Every. Single. Time. Without fail, it's just yet another excuse to go drink. And at some point I felt it was funny. But now i feel incredibly sad, i almost cried today, because i feel like im somehow responsible for this. I dont know how, and maybe im not. Our mom was incredibly abusive towards us in our young age, and he never was able to shake off the mean things she said. She once complained she should have aborted us for being terrible children. I feel like his destructive behaviors, will just cause a much more pronounced and fast death at this point. It's only a matter of time, before i get that phone call and hear the painful words that he passed away. And yet, it feels like all i can do is just watch from the distance

(post is archived)

[–] • 3 pts

Children's personalities are developed in those early years and most parents don't understand the damage they can do to their kids at those ages.

[–] • 3 pts (edited )

he has stage 4 brain cancer in remission

Be a bigger man. Accept that personality disorders are manifesting from frontal lobe involvement. His recklessness is not just because of his genetic predisposition to be an alcoholic.

https://www.niaaa.nih.gov/alcohols-effects-health/alcohol-use-disorder/genetics-alcohol-use-disorder

https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/arh26-3/233-240.htm

I hate alcoholics and laugh when they die, because its easy to never sip a drink of alcohol FOR THE FIRST TIME(S).

However, I feel sad for people with brain damage because even family will not treat them with understanding and love.

His brain is damaged. Be kinder until he dies.

A way to test damage to his frontal lobes of brain is a set of medical tests , smelling peanut butter blindfolded is one test you can try, but...

1 - olfactory function of frontal lobes (Olfactory response) - (detection threshold, quality discrimination, identification)

40 item one time use test - https://sensonics.com/product/smell-identification-test/

2 - executive function of frontal lobes (using the Wisconsin Card Sorting Test)

https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/neuroscience/wisconsin-card-sorting-test

3 - memory test of frontal lobes (using the California Verbal Learning Test (CVLT), or similar meant for frontal lobes

https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/neuroscience/california-verbal-learning-test
[–] • 0 pt

Its just so sad to see though, its like a slow motion train wreck

[–] • 0 pt

how old is your brother?

[–] • 0 pt

And yet, it feels like all i can do is just watch from the distance

That's because all you can do is watch from a distance. Cut him loose. Let him go. Let him be dead to you and then his actual death won't hit you so hard.