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He wears a mask all the way over his nose in public. He makes me wear a face shield which is giving me acne/irritated skin and messing up my hearing for some reason. The last time I wore a mask in public I almost passed out, kept pulling it off my nose and tried taking it off. He told me, “If you love me you’ll wear that right,” but if he loved me I’d assume he’d care about my well-being and not make me almost pass out. I moved the thing off my nose, wore it so loosely it was barely on until we left then I didn’t go out anywhere except family’s house for months after that. Then someone bought me face shields which are still miserable. I used to be allowed to at least go into gas stations without a mask or shield sometimes but now he always makes me wear the shield for some reason?? At least he doesn’t make our young kids wear anything I guess but going into stores or anywhere with them is so depressing. Seeing him wear a mask is embarrassing too, I’m ashamed of him. I told him the masks are emasculating and he got mad at me, said he’s worried about getting sick even though I’ve tried explaining it’s propaganda. He usually agrees that it’s propaganda too, until I told him what I really think about his mask wearing (and forcing me to wear a face shield). I think he knows that and he’s just paranoid about getting in trouble but I’m not sure. He won’t take vitamins, do cardio or even quit smoking to protect himself but he had the nerve to tell me the masks/face shields are for our protection. He reminded me that every time he gets sick it is bad because he smokes, so maybe he is a giant pussy as well as a hopeless addict. He goes outside to smoke so I never minded it much, and he’s been ‘working on quitting’ for 5 years now. Like I said idk if he’s just blaming his shitty lungs bc I called him out on looking stupid wearing masks, he might just be afraid of getting in trouble like he’s said before. Regardless of his reason I’m so done with this but obviously leaving isn’t an option with small children in the picture. He agrees with me on every political subject except this one, provides for us and is otherwise a good husband. I’m furious that I can’t go anywhere without the face shield though, and every time I see him in a mask I respect him less and less. Not to mention keeping me from going out until we got the face shield was unacceptable. I was very depressed and isolated for months. Wearing the face shield isn’t much better, I don’t like having to look at the world through the stupid shield, it makes everything look fake and irritates my skin and ears to where it’s almost not worth going out. I wish we were younger and had met after the corona virus scam so I could’ve seen how bizarrely he reacted to it, we probably wouldn’t have ended up together. I don’t have a time machine and don’t feel like leaving him is right since we have children together. What am I supposed to do?

He wears a mask all the way over his nose in public. He makes me wear a face shield which is giving me acne/irritated skin and messing up my hearing for some reason. The last time I wore a mask in public I almost passed out, kept pulling it off my nose and tried taking it off. He told me, “If you love me you’ll wear that right,” but if he loved me I’d assume he’d care about my well-being and not make me almost pass out. I moved the thing off my nose, wore it so loosely it was barely on until we left then I didn’t go out anywhere except family’s house for months after that. Then someone bought me face shields which are still miserable. I used to be allowed to at least go into gas stations without a mask or shield sometimes but now he always makes me wear the shield for some reason?? At least he doesn’t make our young kids wear anything I guess but going into stores or anywhere with them is so depressing. Seeing him wear a mask is embarrassing too, I’m ashamed of him. I told him the masks are emasculating and he got mad at me, said he’s worried about getting sick even though I’ve tried explaining it’s propaganda. He usually agrees that it’s propaganda too, until I told him what I really think about his mask wearing (and forcing me to wear a face shield). I think he knows that and he’s just paranoid about getting in trouble but I’m not sure. He won’t take vitamins, do cardio or even quit smoking to protect himself but he had the nerve to tell me the masks/face shields are for our protection. He reminded me that every time he gets sick it is bad because he smokes, so maybe he is a giant pussy as well as a hopeless addict. He goes outside to smoke so I never minded it much, and he’s been ‘working on quitting’ for 5 years now. Like I said idk if he’s just blaming his shitty lungs bc I called him out on looking stupid wearing masks, he might just be afraid of getting in trouble like he’s said before. Regardless of his reason I’m so done with this but obviously leaving isn’t an option with small children in the picture. He agrees with me on every political subject except this one, provides for us and is otherwise a good husband. I’m furious that I can’t go anywhere without the face shield though, and every time I see him in a mask I respect him less and less. Not to mention keeping me from going out until we got the face shield was unacceptable. I was very depressed and isolated for months. Wearing the face shield isn’t much better, I don’t like having to look at the world through the stupid shield, it makes everything look fake and irritates my skin and ears to where it’s almost not worth going out. I wish we were younger and had met after the corona virus scam so I could’ve seen how bizarrely he reacted to it, we probably wouldn’t have ended up together. I don’t have a time machine and don’t feel like leaving him is right since we have children together. What am I supposed to do?

(post is archived)

[–] 4 pts

Quite simply, stop.

Live your life. If he gets mad or cries about it who cares? Is he going to hit you? Is he going to leave you?

No. He'd going to yell about it once, and you are going to look him dead in the eye and tell him you are done with the mask bullshit and that there will be no more talk of it. Do not respond when he continues to argue. Do not become explanatory or defensive. Simply do not engage with his mask idiocy.

And you know what he will do? Meekly accept it. Because that's what he is doing with the mask.

Take control of your own life.

[–] 2 pts

This is the right answer. I was a germaphobe as a teen and controlled everyone around me like an autist. It didn’t take long before my friends and fam got tired of my bs and told me they weren’t going to comply. I was upset at first but gave up after a few weeks.

[–] 1 pt

Thank you, you’re right. Worst case scenario he might quit taking me out since I can’t drive. Walking around with a face shield on upsets me to the point that’d be worth the risk though. I tolerated it for a while but it’s gotten ridiculous. I never would have worn the thing in the first place if I thought it would be long term. Originally I agreed to only wear it when we traveled through blue states/cities who actually care about enforcing the mandates. I can’t stand it anymore. Being stuck at home isn’t good but I’m miserable the whole time we’re out anyway. He might just give in if I stand up for myself. I’ve always been awful at that but I’ll try, I can’t live like this.

[–] 0 pt

Why can't you drive

[–] 0 pt

I was in an accident and now every time I try to drive my hands shake, can’t control the car :(