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Note: These episodes were made available by the black flag. I won’t give Disney a dime.

What to say about the latest in the slate of middling, drizzling shits Disney+ is squirting out?

Obi-Wan Kenobi is one of the most hilariously bad offerings I’ve seen yet from the Kathleen Kennedy era.

Sure, the sequel trilogy was so awful that I wouldn’t even screen the third one via piracy. Yes, there were clunker moments in the Disney shows before this point. Absolutely, Solo was awash in the stupids. But Kenobi isn’t even artful in its approach.

The atmosphere is excessively grimdark and depressing. I get that it’s the “dark times” that Obi-Wan spoke of in his little monologue from the first Star Wars movie, but Alec Guinness had a twinkle and charm about him that made it seem as though, “things might be bad, but this guy hasn’t given up.” Not so, here.

They hired a talentless sheboon who can’t even deliver her lines without looking like she’s tripping over her nigger lips to play an “Inquisitor,” evil hunters of the remaining Jedi. Her timing and delivery is always awful, and she appears to be confused by her own lines of dialogue. She’s dumpy and short. In essence, she would be right at home in an intergalactic department of motor vehicles, getting surly over Luke’s X-Wing registration forms being incomplete, not as a menacing force meant to take down mythical wizard knights.

Ewan McGregor looks bored and tired, just like he did in the last two prequels. Only now, rather than facing off with the likes of Christopher Lee and Ian McDiarmid, he has to contend with Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, a young child actress who’s cute but struggling, and dialogue and set pieces intent to make Ben Kenobi look more like “Has-Been Kenobi.”

There was one moment of sheer delight for its stupidity, however, and that was when the group of lily-white Inquisitors confronted Darth Dindu about her tactical failure. Their makeup made them look demonic and evil, just like a fantasy villain ought to look. Meanwhile, she’s just an ugly nigger in a black plastic costume and cape. The other Inquisitors actually took the time to remind her that she’s inferior to them. I swear, I heard banjo music playing, and saw a brief flash of red MAGA hats and confederate battle flags behind the other Inquisitors.

I’ll never be one to say the prequels had any redeeming qualities, but this raw sewage of a tv series makes the fart that was those three films smell like roses in comparison.

Note: These episodes were made available by the black flag. I won’t give Disney a dime. What to say about the latest in the slate of middling, drizzling shits Disney+ is squirting out? Obi-Wan Kenobi is one of the most hilariously bad offerings I’ve seen yet from the Kathleen Kennedy era. Sure, the sequel trilogy was so awful that I wouldn’t even screen the third one via piracy. Yes, there were clunker moments in the Disney shows before this point. Absolutely, Solo was awash in the stupids. But Kenobi isn’t even artful in its approach. The atmosphere is excessively grimdark and depressing. I get that it’s the “dark times” that Obi-Wan spoke of in his little monologue from the first Star Wars movie, but Alec Guinness had a twinkle and charm about him that made it seem as though, “things might be bad, but this guy hasn’t given up.” Not so, here. They hired a talentless sheboon who can’t even deliver her lines without looking like she’s tripping over her nigger lips to play an “Inquisitor,” evil hunters of the remaining Jedi. Her timing and delivery is always awful, and she appears to be confused by her own lines of dialogue. She’s dumpy and short. In essence, she would be right at home in an intergalactic department of motor vehicles, getting surly over Luke’s X-Wing registration forms being incomplete, not as a menacing force meant to take down mythical wizard knights. Ewan McGregor looks bored and tired, just like he did in the last two prequels. Only now, rather than facing off with the likes of Christopher Lee and Ian McDiarmid, he has to contend with Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, a young child actress who’s cute but struggling, and dialogue and set pieces intent to make Ben Kenobi look more like “Has-Been Kenobi.” There was one moment of sheer delight for its stupidity, however, and that was when the group of lily-white Inquisitors confronted Darth Dindu about her tactical failure. Their makeup made them look demonic and evil, just like a fantasy villain ought to look. Meanwhile, she’s just an ugly nigger in a black plastic costume and cape. The other Inquisitors actually took the time to remind her that she’s inferior to them. I swear, I heard banjo music playing, and saw a brief flash of red MAGA hats and confederate battle flags behind the other Inquisitors. I’ll never be one to say the prequels had any redeeming qualities, but this raw sewage of a tv series makes the fart that was those three films smell like roses in comparison.

(post is archived)

[–] • 1 pt

The Prequels were rad. Great world building and Cinematography. Shitty Dialog however, not Georges strong point. This new shit isn't even worth watching for the film-making aspects, plus the dialog is even WORSE.

[–] • 0 pt

The “world building” of the prequels was taking a tube from the ass of the original Star Wars films, putting the other end in its mouth, and acting as though it was generating something new.

Anakin builds Threepio. R2-D2 was Anakin’s astromech droid in space battles. Boba Fett was a clone and his “dad” was the inspiration for the Stormtroopers. Tatooine plays a major role in all three prequels without doing anything new or interesting with the planet. Palpatine’s plot was so easy that the “younglings” basically figured it out in the early moments of Attack of the Clones. The Jedi became feckless and bureaucratic hippie losers.

[–] • 0 pt

I know, it's based. Especially the part about the Spacecops turning into faggots and getting so BTFO'd the bad guy even murders their children.

[–] • 0 pt

There are only three star wars movies.