There once was a Jew who was unhappy about how much money he possessed. "Oy vey," he said, "If only I could shit gold, I would have all the wealth I could ever need, and I would not have to pretend to like dealing with the filthy goyim." Moses heard the Jew's prayer, and granted it. The next day, when the Jew went to the toilet, a gold bar popped out of his ass. The Jew hugged it and kissed it and did a little Jew dance for joy. "Now I will be rich all the days of my life," he said. In celebration, he bought himself an enormous meal of the most expensive meats and pastries and cheeses. The following day, when the Jew went to the toilet, nothing came out. The same thing happened the next day, and the next. After a week of this, the Jew died screamin in horrible pain. When they cut him open, they found seven gold bars plugging up his large intestine. The moral of this tale is that you should eat lots of leafy green vegetables, and not wish for things that are anatomically impossible.