Maybe, to be honest I had to look up what the fuck a lentil is.

I came back after like 9 hours in hopes to see this comment rocketing through the Poal comment upvoat record books. It hasn’t. It probably won’t. But it should. I laughed just as hard this time as I did when I read it earlier. Thanks for the lols.

Diogenes essentially thought that dogs were more moral than man, so he modeled his life after dogs. He lived in a wine barrel in the marketplace. His possessions were a cloak, a walking stick, a bag for his food, and a small bowl. One day he saw a kid using his hand to cup water from the fountain, and said, "fuck this" and threw the bowl away.

He would go to the college where Aristotle taught and troll him like a true shitlord. One time, Aristotle said that main is essentially a featherless chicken. Diogenes went and plucked a chicken (no idea how in the fuck he managed that) and then threw it (alive) into the classroom, shouting, "I found you a man, Aristotle!" He would sit in classrooms bark at philosophers who said something stupid. If they doubled down, he would go shit on the floor in front of them like a dog. If they fucked with him, he would bite them. He had a pack of dogs that hung around with him.

Alexander the Great went to see him once. He was laying on top of his barrel in the sun. Alexander gave him the whole, "I have conquered everywhere I have seen, I am all powerful, nothing is beyond my ability. I have heard of your work, what can I do for you?"

Diogenes told him, "move, you're blocking my sun." Alexander later said that if he wasn't already Alexander, he would want to be Diogenes.

He was the original meme from Fight Club, "you don't own your things, your things own you." When you "work hard" you end up with a bunch of stuff that you have to protect now. You have to maintain your stuff, you have to protect it from thieves, you start worrying about getting more stuff, on and on. If you have a cloak, a stick and a barrel, and you just eat what you find on the ground, you have no worries.

Here's Diogenes in a nutshell. Some other philosopher tried to tell him that motion was an illusion. Diogenes replied by walking away.

YOU MOTHERFUCKING JEW!