925 to go, AOU.
It's been completely transformative.
I drank for around 20 years.
Without telling you my life story, toward the end I'd reached a point where I'd go into withdrawal if my blood alcohol dropped too low. I just lived like that for a few years. I'd sometimes decide to suffer through the withdrawals for a whole weekend, holed up in my apartment planning to enter into a new sober life the following week, only to find my self picking up booze on the way home from work Monday evening.
I could write essays on the spectacularly retarded shit I did in those days
I'd lost the ability to not drink for any substantial amount of time, no matter how much I wanted to stop. I alienated myself from basically everyone I cared about, lost a wife, and eventually a job I'd had for 13 years. I was suicidal and nihilistic.
I'd been slowly coming to the realization that the shitty lying pop culture we live with in the US, treats every religion that isn't Christianity with kids gloves, while it's somehow institutionally acceptable to shit on Christianity. That kind of piqued my interest, and I'd known Christians who were decent functioning people, so I decided to give it a shot. Maybe God could pull me out of the swamp I'd waded into.
I moved to a different state, in with some family, and I started going to church with them. (non denominational Bible focused church - no modern progressive bullshit)
It happened fast. We had an excellent head pastor (he's since retired), who laid it all out in a way that just immediately struck me as true. So I found God, but I wasn't yet sober. I lived like that: slowly working my way back into drinking all the time, but otherwise maintaining a job, etc, for another couple years.
Eventually the drinking got bad enough that I felt I was going to blow my life apart again, so I went into treatment. 45 days later, I was ready to try living sober for real. Mind you, I drank in the airport on the way home, but I immediately started going to meetings when I got back.
The 12 step program completely changed everything. At first, I never really believed it could work. I didn't think I'd ever not want to drink. It struck me as a social club for people who could no longer party.
Thank God I met a woman in the program who wouldn't let me take her out until I'd gotten through the 7th step. I got a sponsor and worked through the steps in something like 3 months.
I literally did it for the wrong reasons, believing it wouldn't work, but because I did it sincerely, it worked. It also made my faith in God about 500% stronger.
Alcohol was never the problem, my own horse shit was at fault. I'd been too scared to face certain aspects of life and of my self, so I'd "medicated" those feelings away. I did that for so long I became dependent on the "medicine."
I'd had no peace because I'd felt like I had to manage everything if I wanted to get what I wanted in life, rather than trusting that this God I professed to believe in would provide.
These days I run a team that kicks ass at work, I sponsor a couple guys, I'm on committees, I run a newsletter, I'm back at my old hobbies, and my walk with God is amazing. I'm no longer filled with shame or regret. I'm working out and moving toward being my best self. I owe it all to God and the 12 steps.
The international jew wants you ineffective and self destructive. Don't be a hedonistic farm animal.
Beer contains phytoestrogens. Ditch the tits; call it quits.
Liquor companies are mostly run by people who want to enslave you and your children. Be a boss; stay /offthesauce.
14/11
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