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There’s something viscerally thrilling about unashamedly pushing my car to the absolute max and still being passed by everything. It makes me feel connected to the machine itself. Anybody can buy a car that’s at least relatively zippy. On the contrary, you have to intentionally hunt for a car that’s impressively slow, since most modern cars are pretty quick by design.

Although being at the absolute top of the speed totem pole is prohibitively expensive, I can almost guarantee my car is slower than my friends, and I don’t feel bad about boasting about it. “I KNOW my car is slower than yours” feels so good to say.