I'm sorry if this comes off a bit rude, but are you parodying Hans? Any time I hear someone talk about body parts that's where my mind goes.
I'm fairly certain Hans is a brunette. More importantly, would blondes really be more likely than their dark-haired counterparts to gain weight?
How do you know he isn't some SJW shill that is made to make it look like white people nazis are a lot more common. Seems like a viable option. I have my doubt about a few people here in that regard.
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