I’m currently writing this on the way to the ER. I barely have any toothpaste left. I’m sweating. I’m in tears. Reddit, PLEASE help me! This all started in the morning as I was getting ready for school. As I went to brush my teeth, I noticed that, (after futile attempts to squeeze anything out) my toothpaste tube was empty. I went rummaging around my house, trying to find some, when In my brother’s bathroom drawer lay a freshly sealed tube of toothpaste, labeled ‘BALCK’ in an intimidating grey industrial lettering. Huh. I went to my bathroom and screwed open the cap. A brief flash of a strange, comforting feeling washed over me. I came to, and deposited a.... (black...?) Liquid onto my toothbrush, and inserted it into my mouth. Let me preface this next part by saying that I’m entirely not sure how any of this is physically possible. I’m not religious, but after this event, I heavily considered going to a church or SOMETHING. As I felt the toothpaste against the thistles of my brush on my tongue, I experienced the strongest desire in my whole life, ever. ....to continue brushing. And to keep brushing. And to not stop for any reason whatsoever. like an instinct, my right arm suddenly jerked into action, furiously brushing and grinding the substance into my teeth. I was so surprised by this that I actually screamed, but my plea was drowned out by my fervor. Seconds pass as I became increasingly panicked, and fail to stop my arm from chugging along. I somehow managed, through intense thought and willpower, to decrease the pace of the brushing, and calmed down a bit. “I need the toothpaste” I think, and suddenly grab the metal tube and pour more pasty black goo in my mouth. The speed increased and my arm becomes more erratic and violent in its movement. A few minutes of this pass as it slowly dials down, but my desire for more toothpaste increases. I long for it. Seconds pass, and I have to physically will myself to NOT PUT MORE IN. I long for it, deeply. I become hungry, angry, horny for it. Desire pleaded my senses to give in, but I resisted. Barely. My parents tell me to get in the car, as they are leaving the house and don’t want to be late for work. I oblige and sat in the backseat, past my sister and her friend who is carpooling. I keet brushing, slowly and more subdued, but still furiously and increasingly desiring more to add more toothpaste. Her friend looks back at me and nervously waves, and i try my best to smile back. I’m sure I looked like a psychopath, grinning with a BLACK smile, and my brush still in my mouth. I sweated and became anxious, nervous, frightened as the car approached the school. I BOLTED out of the car as soon at it came to a stop and ran to a place where i could add toothpaste with no one seeing me. And i finally caved, and gave in. I squeezed almost a quarter of the tube in. The most refreshing, floral, relieving, alleviating, minty, appeasing feeling washed over my whole body. I shuddered as i felt toothpaste on my tongue and let it mix with my saliva and wash over my whole mouth. my whole mouth was at utter peace.... I opened my eyes to see my LEFT arm now, moving faster than i have ever seen it move. Heat emanated from my limb as it vigorously brushed by gum. My body shook, vibrated from the force and speed at which my arm brushed. I literally almost lost balance. I came to the horrifying conclusion as the same feelings from before came back. I had to finish the tube. I continue my day as normally as possible, attending class while trying to sit the the back, sweating as i periodically add more toothpaste. I figure out that if i add a little bit at a time, I can pass off as brushing my teeth at a normal speed. My largest fear, though, is swallowing. I don’t know what I would become, what I would do, and if I would end up injured. Eyes shot, I try not to give attention to myself and try to blend in with the class. In 3rd period, I squeezed a bit too much in and my arm brushed at a speed that could have startled someone. I glance behind me and pray no one saw, but to my displeasure see an audience of eyeballs staring back at me. So much liquid has accumulated in my mouth at this point that I have to consider my method of disposal. At the end of the period, I make a beeline for the water fountain, and barf a thick, bubbly, dark sludge into the machine, which promptly stops working. I calculate that I can get away with emptying my mouth every two periods and still just seem like a guy brushing his teeth in the middle of the day. I spend my entire lunch period in the bathroom, locked in a stall, planning the rest of the day. But right before seventh period, thinking that i was almost at the end of my school day, I made one pivotal mistake. On the side of the school i was, there were no bathrooms or sinks. I REALLY had to relapse. Frantically tearing through the halls as people stepped into their classrooms and cleared the halls, I came to a horrible conclusion. I HAD to swallow. Two minutes late, I bust open the door of my seventh period classroom open as the ENTIRE CLASS sees a bloodshot, shaking addict stumble into the classroom. I take my seat in the back as concerned faces periodically turn their head to see me. Still brushing. with tears forming around my eyes, PANTING though my nose, I look at what’s left of the half-full tube. my vision focuses slowly on the toothpaste, and my hearing slowly fades to a high pitch ringing. I can now only perceive the toothpaste. And in a split second, the only thought in my head is: MORE!!! I do just that. In a fraction of a second. I squeeze ABSOLUTELY ALL OF THE TOOTHPASTE into my gaping maw. And as my hearing, vision, and feeling return, i notice my arms, BOTH OF MY ARMS are brushing this time, at a speed that makes them BARELY VISIBLE. WIND is blown on my face as the speed at which i now brush, polish, buff, no- SAND my teeth, as my worn out lips hopelessly flutter about, sending black goo flying across the room. A small glimmer of hope for me is realized when correctly adjust my eyes and perceive the classroom. The teacher appears to be on the phone with the paramedics, with my classmates pressed against the wall, out of the blast radius. I somehow manage to get up and leave the class, now bawling, as my exhausted jaw hangs open with black sludge dripping out. I attempt to run outside, when i am grabbed from behind, behind told to stay still. I come to, in this ambulance, being driven somewhere. Looking at my clothes, i now notice that most of my shirt is stained from my black saliva. But I’m too exhausted. I need to calm down and assess my situation. I will keep you all posted.