I suspect the battery is just dead and the doors are locked. I had a dead battery in my Chevy truck one time and the fob would not unlock the doors just the same. I didn't blame Chevrolet for "Locking me out" I guess Teslas don't have a keyhole in the door? I'll have to look at one next time I see it.

Tesla declares total loss on the batteries for the slightest ding, dent or scratch. Granted, the batteries are hyper volatile and any dent can potentially cause them to burst into a very difficult to smother fire, but at the same time they are extreme about this. Almost any damage at all and Tesla will declare you need an entirely new battery. Which itself is misleading because it's not a single battery, it's a fuckload of 18860 (or whatever number they are, not gonna look it up) laptop batteries wired in series in a big plastic case or whatever.

So theoretically they could just replace the impacted cells and it would cost, at MOST, a few hundred dollars.

But that's not their policy. Their policy is that any damage warrants replacing the entire array, which is $26k+ depending on model etc etc. Guaranteed they reclaim and reuse all the undamaged cells anyway, but it's basically a scam.

Teslas are fucking garbage, not only because EVs are garbage in general but because of the policies related to maintenance of the cars.