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I live alone, dont have anyone to lean on even if I wanted to. Well I got a spoiled as shit Dog. I would like to stop drinking, notice I didnt say want to. I use to work out and am still in reasonable shape so it wouldnt take much to do it again but where is the motivation? I know all about the dopamine shit by drinking. Being knowledgeable about it doesnt help at all.

Fuck, maybe it does just boil down to man up. I just wish I had a reason besides myself.

I live alone, dont have anyone to lean on even if I wanted to. Well I got a spoiled as shit Dog. I would like to stop drinking, notice I didnt say want to. I use to work out and am still in reasonable shape so it wouldnt take much to do it again but where is the motivation? I know all about the dopamine shit by drinking. Being knowledgeable about it doesnt help at all. Fuck, maybe it does just boil down to man up. I just wish I had a reason besides myself.

(post is archived)

[–] • 16 pts

Motivation is for children. You need discipline.

[–] • 2 pts

so your gonna come spank me? get real

[–] • 6 pts

You misread me.

[–] • 1 pt

But you'll still do it for him?

[–] • 5 pts

Discipline is working out even when you have no motivation. So basically yeah pull yourself up by your boot straps.

[–] • 3 pts

Self-discipline

[–] • 1 pt

Yes he needs to spank himself.

[–] [deleted] • 5 pts

Find a church that aligns with your beliefs and start going. Try going to a gym and eating better; very likely you'd meet someone to motivate you to stop drinking; get married and have some beautiful White babies. You'll never quit until you decide to quit- or you have to quit...or you'll die...it's up to you, no one can convince you or make you do it. It has to be in you. That's what it took for me, I almost died and that was it. Find life. Find a purpose. Go to school and become a paramedic. A firefighter. A trauma nurse. Become a teacher. join the Peace Corps...join Habitat for Humanity...go for it. Reach beyond yourself and discover who you are.

[–] • 2 pts

I truly appreciate your advice. If I lived in a town or city it may make more sense.

[–] • 2 pts (edited )

(sorry this got so long but it's worth it, I promise)

Not living in a town/city does not exclude you from God, in old times these monks and stuff would run out to the desert specifically to get away from civilization and grow closer to God.

When I did that, suddenly my (now) wife popped into my life one day. I had spent 4+ years single and searching (not sleeping around) and then after I said "fuck this I'm focusing on my relationship with God" she just appeared shortly after, like a brick thrown through my window with a note attached. And with the snap of a finger my bad habits started falling off without any effort on my part. I even stopped smoking (been more than a year since I threw my last pack in the trash. However I do still take a few drags if I'm like, chilling with friends and having a good time or something).

For me the problem wasn't the drinking, the drinking was just how I dealt with all of the other crap boiling under the surface that I didn't know (or didn't care) how to sort through. Drinking was just the pressure release valve, and it was a very small valve, so even though it would ease things somewhat things were still piling up faster than they were being released with the drinking.

God is the one who sorted that out, I think he's the only one who can, just like you can't do brain surgery on yourself you can't fix your soul either, all you can do is sign off on the consent form. And it wasn't from me praying for hours on end like a monastic, my logic was "well if God is the creator and I want to be more like him, I should participate in the act of creation". So I started making art and music and all kinds of stuff, being happy and loving in general, and then it was like the dam broke open (and it didn't take very long either). That was my form of prayer (although the other forms matter too). That was how I spoke to God and how God spoke to me. Through my art, and seeing his art, and appreciating it and feeling his creative energies flow through me.

I can't say if the same is true for your problems and your situation. All I can say is what worked for me and why. I'm happily married and we have a one year old, I do still drink beer a couple times a week, but it isn't something that I rely on and I don't feel some overwhelming urge to go get some. That all disappeared instantly once the underlying issues were sorted.

, it felt like a message. Every word is so relevant to my walk with God. That's real love, and the love you and God are supposed to share could be something completely different. But this is how God and I have our conversations, that's the language he speaks to me.

I'd say, you just need to have that conversation too, in whatever unique language it is that you two speak. A monk once said that God is like a tree we are all circled around, and while we all see that tree from different perspectives, it's still the same tree. We all have a unique walk and a unique language with Him that nobody else can truly understand, only you can know what that is.

[–] • 1 pt

Without the God part my exwife happened that same way. I lived a mile from where I now do (we moved and I hadn't been back for almost 30 years) She was looking for a lost cat.

[–] [deleted] • 2 pts

You'll find your way, just allow it to happen.

[–] • 4 pts

It might help to burn into your mind the fact that most of the national and international institutions you probably hate WANT you to be drunk. I used to tell an atheist friend in treatment who had trouble finding a "higher power": "You're no use to the ethnostate as a drunk."

I've been thinking we should have a sobriety sub. I feel like there used to be one, but I can't find it now.

I do the whole AA thing, but this hypothetical sub should be open to all who want support in quitting.

I'm on here all the time, but it's absolutely not in my nature to run a sub. Hopefully someone will jump in. If they do, I'll support it.

[–] • 4 pts

Everything you do is a choice you alone make. If you want a better life, make different choices. Unfortunately you know the drinking is bad but don't want to stop. Easy for me to say all this from my position, I know.

[–] • 2 pts

Thats the thing, Im pretty sure my life isnt going to get better no matter what I do.

[–] • 4 pts

Self-fulfilling prophecy. Whether you think things will get better or worse, you will always be right. Since focus and word choice can determine our reality, then it may be worth trying to make incremental adjustments to both.

[–] • 3 pts

If you don't like people do this for yourself. Prove to yourself that you can be better than the society you don't like. Cut right back on drinking, stay healthy.

[–] • 2 pts (edited )

Thats the thing, Im pretty sure my life isnt going to get better no matter what I do.

You can improve your incomes though. How? I have no idea, but that alone can lead to a lot of changes, starting with the place you live...

https://youtu.be/09pgl0Ira9o?t=101

Why don't you create a cult? Some sort of organization and you're the guru/frontman, and it's understood shits are all done in your name, while you just preside and everybody else is anon, you're the president, all technicalities are handled by shadowy figures behind the curtain... Waco sans massacre... And then we raise funds to erect stones, with crazy stuffs written all over it, like, kill everybody until we reach 500 million, etc

THe church of fuckallyall

[–] • 1 pt

then find someone else's life to make better

[–] • 4 pts

Start small man. If you usually start drinking as soon as you come home from work and stop drinking at midnight. Then all next week find some reason to wait 10-15 minutes to start drinking and stop at 11:45. Do it for a week. Now make it 30 minutes and stop at 11:30.

For working out, if your not drunk already, get down and do as many push-ups as you can right now. Maybe it's 5, maybe it's 500. Do one set and be done. Now do that the rest of the week. Next week at some small percentage. Maybe it's 6 or 510 depending on where you started. In two weeks, do two sets of 6 or 510.

If you're regularly doing pushups then buy at pullup bar. I recommend "Perfect Fitness Multi-Gym Doorway Pull Up Bar" because the part that goes against the door molding is flat and doesn't dent it. You could probably pick one up on offer up for like $5-10.

If you can do pull ups and push ups regularly I'd look into a book like "Convict Conditioning." It's on the various torrent sites.

Don't be hard on yourself if you slip up. Look to the long term. Hope you end up getting where ever you're trying to go. Everything takes time. Do what you can and change in small increments. Good luck.

[–] • 3 pts

You need Jesus in your life

[–] • 3 pts

Invite Teddy to your place when he gets back from rehab.

[–] • 3 pts

Real advice to quit drinking?

Well you're always going to want to drink. It's not going away. The only thing you can do is avoid buying it and get someone to keep you accountable.

Most of the alcoholics anonymous stuff is pure peer pressure.

You could try keeping yourself accountable, but then you wouldn't have a problem moderating your drinking in the first place.

I just don't buy it until I want to have a binge session and then I only buy the equivalent of two regular size wine bottles.

You could try using a budget to cut down, but this would only work if you actually follow the budget.

[–] • 3 pts

Yeah man, you would think money would be enough of a motivator. Between it and cigs....

[–] • 3 pts

Yup that's why they use peer pressure for alcoholics anonymous.

You will only quit when you want to or when you have to.

Now I wouldn't recommend quitting smoking and drinking at the same time. Especially if you smoke and drink a lot and live alone.

[–] • 2 pts

As an outsider it seems like the AA stuff is all about replacing drinking with meetings/meet ups.

[–] • 1 pt

That's just part of the social "support group" aspect of it.

[–] • 3 pts

https://boardwalkrecoverycenter.com/medications-to-help-stop-drinking/

Also ask your doctor about antidepressants perhaps. One side effect of quitting drinking is a period of anhedonia where you aren't really able to feel joy. It helped me. Idk.

[–] • 3 pts

Think about it, do you feel better drinking or do you feel better lifting weights and running or riding a bike? Do girls want to fuck a guy who's a drunk, who has bad breath, missing teeth, slurs his words? or do they want to fuck a guy who looks like Henry Cavill? When you look in the mirror are you proud of yourself or do you see just a man whose liver is falling out of his stomach. The neat thing about working out is you don't have to start out doing crazy shit literally start with push-ups and sit-ups and jumping jacks. Go for a fucking half mile jog around the high school track. Think about all the money you save not pissing it away on nigger booze.

I'm not saying I'm fucking amazing by any means, no, I'm pretty bottom of the barrel but I like to work out 3 days a week, I like to do something that involves heart pumping everyday. anus expander, get your mind out of the gutter and Anticlutch either tuck it or don't, I don't care. but you know what I mean, we all got problems, everyone that's on here is fucked up one way or another, but that's just the way the world goes. what have you got to lose to be honest, for just trying to work out and putting the booze down for a day,for two, for three?

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