I dont think there is such a thing as an intellectual conversation with a woman, it feels more like being an emotional tampon or listening to verbal vomit live. A lot of times, I also noticed that I can "fix" what a woman says in dozens of words, into something as simple as 3 or 4. Women are NOT better communicators, contrary to the media, they just love to talk talk talk, talk your ear off. And when you try to interject because not all of us can understand 50 years of back story walking into a conversation, you're branded rude for asking irrelevant questions. As if i'm supposed to just know these things ....
Women do not want their problems to be solved, they want their problems to be heard.
See that was my mistake right there, assuming they wanted an actual answer. Really, i should have let her rant and said nothing and i would have come out some kind of mystic saint instead
I've listened to many GFs bitch about problems at work, or problems with friends, and I offered then what I thought was really good, reasonable advice.
They don't want that shit.
They want you to listen, and say
That Rachel girl at work sounds awful. She should be fired. I can't believe she dresses like that. No wonder she's dating that loser, Simon.
It's very true that women don't want things fixed or answers to their questions/problems. It's also true that Men are fixers, problem solvers, and always try to have answers. This is important information that I would have liked to have had when I was very young! REMEMBER THAT, ANY OF YOU THAT ARE RAISING BOYS! I believe that the main thing you should take away from this experience is the fact that she made fun of you! That is a bigger deal breaker to me than any of the rest of it. Your woman should NEVER EVER make fun of you, especially around other people! If I were in your place I would walk for that reason alone. This shows that she has no respect for you. It is possible to gain respect from a woman but it could take Years of your life to do it! If you two had children she would be just as disrespectful to you in front of them, meaning that your children would grow up disrespecting you also! You might, just Might, eventually gain her respect, but you would never gain respect from your children.
Damnit. I needed to hear this at this exact moment. I'm currently going through something similar and this comment really calmed me down. Much appreciated, mate
Hope everything works out well for you and the "girl" you're with.
Because the problem isn't the problem, it's that she needs to process her emotions and she craves validation.
This should be a permanent heading on the front page and it’s universally true
I have given you wisdom.
Now give me a writing prompt.
Actually, they DO eventually want it solved.. but before that happens, they want to bitch/cry about it and be heard..they want to be held, coddled, listened to first and foremost.. if you let them do that and get all the tears or emotion out, then and only then should you bring up ideas to solve it.
Women don't want their problems solved, they want you to listen to how it's not their fault, how they did nothing wrong and how they are right and completely justified in their actions and feelings.
They get in trouble for showing up late to work or something else. - They don't want to be told ways in which they can get there faster next time. Instead, they want you to listen to how it isn't their fault; how they did nothing wrong. By giving them advice or help in making sure it never happens again, you are saying that they were in the wrong and they need to change.
A coworker or family member is doing something they don't like - They don't want to hear ways in which they can fix the problem. Instead, they want you to agree with them, and tell them that they are right.
If you don't agree with them, then you didn't listen. Because if you did listen, then you would know that they did nothing wrong, and they are completely justified in their actions and feelings. And by trying to help them fix it, you are saying that it's their fault and that their actions or inactions are the reason the problem exists. But if you would have listened, you would know that it's not their fault, they did nothing wrong, and how they are completely right in everything they do.
Women are fucking awful communicators.
I've yet to meet a woman who gave a succinct story.
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