How many times per week is it acceptable for a wife to scream at her husband, throw things, damage the house, and tell him he should kill himself?

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[–] • 0 pt

What is a good non-swinging way to become less attached? I think over attachment is why I can't deal with her tantrums. She was my first GF after running away from an abusive childhood.

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[–] [deleted] • 0 pt

You ran from an abusive parent to an abusive gf. Do you see the pattern? You're playing our your childhood 'role' all over again.

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[–] • 0 pt

Haha lol, same background myself, minus the running away part. I lived through it allll the way. People who go through what we have are why textbooks on unhealthy attachment are written. But there is always hope, any situation, no matter how bleak, can always be improved. Most of what you're going to learn could be distilled down to 'mindset'.

There is a mountain of work ahead of you, changes in character and personality which require the acquisition of related knowledge before you can grow into the person you want to become. I've spent the last 10 yrs working on this particular path, but in the last 2-3 yrs I really saw significant changes. I'll never stop growing and each new day is progress regardless of what happens. You need to educate YOURSELF on psychology, philosophy, the red pill knowledge that you're not taught in schools. The stuff that makes you a social pariah among your pears instantly. There was a great essay written about 2010 that predicted so much of what came later, I couldn't find the link but it was about the end of the social contract and the coming four horsemen. The main thing is what you need is like fight club, and the first rule of fight club is you do not talk about fight club with the gen pop, only vetted members. Please do not make the mistake of having to learn this yourself the hard way, but don't beat yourself up if you do.

Ultimately, you need what so many men today need. We need to learn how to be real MEN. The way in which you will ultimately define the standards a MAN must meet will be up to you to a degree. However, you will need to learn of your true history. Philosophy, Stoicism, Dedication, and Honor to yourself and your people. What women expect of us has not changed, we've simply been fooled into believing otherwise. For women, it's not so much a concern because they are the ones who select, and there's always enough wealthy men around to satisfy the ease with which many women will share a high-value man.

TL;DR: To answer your question more directly, you need to become the kind of man that other women want. Generally, your starting point would be to go out and try to flirt with women, but this isn't so much an option for you. If you got rejected by enough women you'd be more confident around them eventually if you kept on track. Once you got just good enough you'd have more success and women would come to you more. Trust me when a say this, the key is the stage once women start coming to you more and more. That's the part that will kick your growth into high gear. So you could grind away with the public interactions and rejection angle... or you can skip years and just get into good or great physical shape. You can do this in 3 months or less. Once women start noticing you, your wife will immediately start noticing them noticing you ;)

Women only want what other women want. You may notice 1/3 or 1/2 of the women that check you out in public... your SO notices 100% of the glances from other women. If other women don't find you attractive then she doesn't find you attractive. This includes clothing, your walk, how you stand and carry yourself, your posture. It sounds so cliche but it really is just this simple, ACT LIKE A FUCKING MAN!. The tone of delivery there is again something you need to learn to appreciate. It's fucked, we all agree, but just fucking do it, don't let anything or anyone take advantage of you. And then appreciate the rewards your efforts bring and always remain humble. Do you have a respectable wardrobe? Any dress shirts and pants in there? Can you correctly color coordinate your own clothes or do you look like a clown? How good are you at ironing your clothes? If my girl irons in my creases or does my tie, it's because she likes doing it and I let her... but it is never because I cannot.

We've all got it in us deep down, it's only a matter of undoing the brainwashing and finding the things they took out and put them back in. The rest of us all want to see you succeed because then it's one less woman the rest of us need to manage ;) Honest to god, they're mostly all wrecks in some way, like children. It's up to men to keep dumb people from hurting themselves and there is so much work to be done in the world.

Haha lol, same background myself, minus the running away part. I lived through it allll the way. People who go through what we have are why textbooks on unhealthy attachment are written. But there is always hope, any situation, no matter how bleak, can always be improved. Most of what you're going to learn could be distilled down to 'mindset'. There is a mountain of work ahead of you, changes in character and personality which require the acquisition of related knowledge before you can grow into the person you want to become. I've spent the last 10 yrs working on this particular path, but in the last 2-3 yrs I really saw significant changes. I'll never stop growing and each new day is progress regardless of what happens. You need to educate YOURSELF on psychology, philosophy, the red pill knowledge that you're not taught in schools. The stuff that makes you a social pariah among your pears instantly. There was a great essay written about 2010 that predicted so much of what came later, I couldn't find the link but it was about the end of the social contract and the coming four horsemen. The main thing is what you need is like fight club, and the first rule of fight club is you do not talk about fight club with the gen pop, only vetted members. Please do not make the mistake of having to learn this yourself the hard way, but don't beat yourself up if you do. Ultimately, you need what so many men today need. We need to learn how to be real MEN. The way in which you will ultimately define the standards a MAN must meet will be up to you to a degree. However, you will need to learn of your true history. Philosophy, Stoicism, Dedication, and Honor to yourself and your people. What women expect of us has not changed, we've simply been fooled into believing otherwise. For women, it's not so much a concern because they are the ones who select, and there's always enough wealthy men around to satisfy the ease with which many women will share a high-value man. TL;DR: To answer your question more directly, you need to become the kind of man that other women want. Generally, your starting point would be to go out and try to flirt with women, but this isn't so much an option for you. If you got rejected by enough women you'd be more confident around them eventually if you kept on track. Once you got just good enough you'd have more success and women would come to you more. Trust me when a say this, the key is the stage once women start coming to you more and more. That's the part that will kick your growth into high gear. So you could grind away with the public interactions and rejection angle... or you can skip years and just get into good or great physical shape. You can do this in 3 months or less. Once women start noticing you, your wife will immediately start noticing them noticing you ;) Women only want what other women want. You may notice 1/3 or 1/2 of the women that check you out in public... your SO notices 100% of the glances from other women. If other women don't find you attractive then she doesn't find you attractive. This includes clothing, your walk, how you stand and carry yourself, your posture. It sounds so cliche but it really is just this simple, ACT LIKE A FUCKING MAN!. The tone of delivery there is again something you need to learn to appreciate. It's fucked, we all agree, but just fucking do it, don't let anything or anyone take advantage of you. And then appreciate the rewards your efforts bring and always remain humble. Do you have a respectable wardrobe? Any dress shirts and pants in there? Can you correctly color coordinate your own clothes or do you look like a clown? How good are you at ironing your clothes? If my girl irons in my creases or does my tie, it's because she likes doing it and I let her... but it is never because I cannot. We've all got it in us deep down, it's only a matter of undoing the brainwashing and finding the things they took out and put them back in. The rest of us all want to see you succeed because then it's one less woman the rest of us need to manage ;) Honest to god, they're mostly all wrecks in some way, like children. It's up to men to keep dumb people from hurting themselves and there is so much work to be done in the world.

parent
link