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[–] [deleted] 3 pts

It happens to the best of us.

[–] 2 pts

be me
go to to the outhouse to make pee-pee in the middle of the night in December
dark af - can't see muh dik
cold af - can't feel muh dik
pull shaft out of fly, aim at hole
muh dik too long - tip is still in pants
make pee-pee

[–] 2 pts

Yeah, gotta remember to take off your pants when pooping in the woods.

[–] [deleted] 2 pts

Just not in tall grass. Chigger bites, aka summer penile syndrome, sucks.

[–] 2 pts

Yeah, that happens to me sometimes.

I'll be getting my dick sucked behind the 7-11, and brush it against some of the grass or the dumpster, and all of the sudden it hurts to pee and my doctor tells me my T-Cell count is low.

Fucking chigger bites.