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I got engaged to my fianceé in April. Shortly after, we found out she was pregnant. This has been a source of great joy for me and both of our families. It was to her also. Our lives have become centered around the baby, who is due March 2nd. Tomorrow we are moving out of our individual one bedroom apartments to move into a large two bedroom house. She is not going to work anymore after this and I’ve worked my ass off, having only four days off in four months to try and save more money in preparation. We never had any problems before, we were happy and excited for the future. That is all changing very rapidly. She has started insulting me, all the time. I’m working actual 80 hour weeks and doing my best to give her everything, and I’m mocked for being tired. She has become so cruel towards me. I smile and tell her she needs to take it easy. She says things so degrading and demeaning I’d hit her if she wasn’t pregnant and this has become the norm. I keep justifying it by telling myself she is pregnant and hormonal, but I can’t help but feel that this is something else entirely. Now the night before we are moving she’s telling me she wants no life with me, that she’s leaving as soon as her dad finds her a new place to move, calling me pathetic, how the child will never know me. That’s only a snapshot. She will say the worst things she can conjure up . Mind you I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. I started myown carpentry business this year after working for someone else for fifteen years. I’m providing for her every way I can. I’m renting out a distillery and throwing her a baby shower, hired a planner and having it catered for all her friends and family. I may be biased but any one else would be very happy right now and yet I am getting nothing but vitriol. It’s all being stolen from me. Even if she stays out of necessity I can’t live like this. Everything seems bleak and my options all seem drastic. I can’t think clear enough about this from within this nightmare. I don’t have any friends around here. What are your thoughts

I got engaged to my fianceé in April. Shortly after, we found out she was pregnant. This has been a source of great joy for me and both of our families. It was to her also. Our lives have become centered around the baby, who is due March 2nd. Tomorrow we are moving out of our individual one bedroom apartments to move into a large two bedroom house. She is not going to work anymore after this and I’ve worked my ass off, having only four days off in four months to try and save more money in preparation. We never had any problems before, we were happy and excited for the future. That is all changing very rapidly. She has started insulting me, all the time. I’m working actual 80 hour weeks and doing my best to give her everything, and I’m mocked for being tired. She has become so cruel towards me. I smile and tell her she needs to take it easy. She says things so degrading and demeaning I’d hit her if she wasn’t pregnant and this has become the norm. I keep justifying it by telling myself she is pregnant and hormonal, but I can’t help but feel that this is something else entirely. Now the night before we are moving she’s telling me she wants no life with me, that she’s leaving as soon as her dad finds her a new place to move, calling me pathetic, how the child will never know me. That’s only a snapshot. She will say the worst things she can conjure up . Mind you I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. I started myown carpentry business this year after working for someone else for fifteen years. I’m providing for her every way I can. I’m renting out a distillery and throwing her a baby shower, hired a planner and having it catered for all her friends and family. I may be biased but any one else would be very happy right now and yet I am getting nothing but vitriol. It’s all being stolen from me. Even if she stays out of necessity I can’t live like this. Everything seems bleak and my options all seem drastic. I can’t think clear enough about this from within this nightmare. I don’t have any friends around here. What are your thoughts

(post is archived)

[–] 2 pts

Then agree and amplify:

Her: “I feel him moving and it makes me feel so incredibly sorry that he has to be born and know someone as pathetic as you.”

You: "And this isn't even my final form!"

Her: "You are an embarrassment to everyone who knows me. You are pain ugly!"

You: "I can't believe I tricked you into making my child with this face of mine. I guess that's 1 - 0 for me."

Her: "Wait until my dad finds an appartment for me and I'll make sure you'll never see your son again."

You: "Yeah, that will probably make me very sad. Got to make a new child with somebody else then, just to replace my sorrow."

And whenever she's not in crazy mode, tell her that you love her and that you'll take care of her. But if she goes into crazy mode, just be an oak.

[–] -1 pt

This is absolutely terrible advice.

Are you a teenager, virgin, incel, all of the above?

[–] 0 pt

It shows that you don't understand what framing is. The point is to not get into her frame.

How would you react, if a toddler said these words?