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[–] • 2 pts

Sign 1: a door or window has been used and you're not the cause of it.

The rest of the signs don't matter, install alarms and cameras on your entry points and never leave your wife alone if you decide to take her somewhere.

[–] • 2 pts

It’s called hypergamy, all women are doing this. No matter how much she loves you, no matter what she says, she will leave you for something better. Only men are loyal, women are not. Chivalry and honor are strictly male. It’s how we survived and built civilizations.

[–] • 0 pt

That's why you need to make sure she doesn't get opportunities to cheat.

[–] • 0 pt

Be scary to the other apes. Works great. You can be cool and easy going, but as soon as she mentions a new coworker and how nice he is, go beat the shit out of him. She will understand.