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939

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[–] 0 pt

You caught me. I’m actually a dog. A mutt - probably Labrador and Boston Terrier mix in there somewhere. No papers. Neutered in the shelter before I was adopted. Never bred pups. Can’t vote. Can’t even go out without tags.

Live with a sad thirty-something woman with a career but no husband. She calls me her “fur baby.” She rode the cock carousel in my early days. Brought home a lot of niggers. Now she spends most nights drinking and watching The Office, whining about where all of the “good men” are.

Thankfully, she hasn’t lost enough dignity to get out the peanut butter… yet.

you are not funny

[–] 0 pt

Only to people with no sense of humor.

your original comment was just a lie, you only wrote because you'd get points