[Source.](https://babylonbee.com/news/new-mexico-governor-suspends-first-amendment-to-silence-criticism-over-suspending-second-amendment) > ALBUQUERQUE, NM — Governor Michelle Lujan Grisham called yet another news conference to announce she was now suspending the First Amendment to silence the heavy criticism she has received for suspending the Second Amendment. > "I am officially declaring that people criticizing me for stripping constitutional rights is a public health emergency," she said when making the controversial announcement. "Due to the terrifying response to my second amendment decision, I am feeling really bad about myself and now have no choice but to suspend the First Amendment as well. So…you know…be quiet. QUIET!"