Ah well there you go! Until you've been to a proper rub a dub, hard to judge. In other countries it is an accepted way of life and not a big deal like the US. Theres a type called a Turkey bath where hot chick bathes you, then proceeds to use her hands and the rest of her body to massage you. There is a happy ending, but no penetration. It is VERY relaxing. You do nothing but lay there relaxing. Afterwards get another bath to wash off all the oil. IIRC it was 20-40 bucks for about a 2-3 hour deal. No timers, no rush. Just total relaxation. Other places it is just like an add on. Discuss beforehand or not. Does not matter to the chick. Get a massage only or add on 10 bucks for a release at the end. In some cultures it's also about health. Releasing stress and whatnot. DIY is not nearly as relaxing as the methods above.