I was talking about this to my gf, she hates all the new age marriage formalities: the cake, the wedding, etc. What happened to just getting married? Back many moons ago, divorce meant the liability of the consequencs fell on the person who did those actions, for example cheating. If you cheat on your husband, you were at fault. Now all these protections have been completely removed

A couple of months ago, I bought a lottery ticket. After I finished ticking the numbers, I stood up and walked up to the bar to register it and a bird shat on my ticket

The shit fell from high above in the sky, there were no trees, nothing above me except the sky... 1 in a billion chances for this to happen but it happened nonetheless... It's a sign, I concluded...

Of course I wondered what god, the universe, reality, providence or whatever, tried to tell me that day...

So days went by, and I checked if I won or not

I lost

...

So, in hindsight, what god tried to tell me, is that I'll only get shit with lottery, that's all