The M&P EZ series. I bought my mom the 9mm variant. Pretty nice little pistol.
It's an interesting experience to own your first hand gun- it's sort of scary because this thing has so much destructive potential and you want to use it but also you don't want to ever have to use it. It does give me a sense of defense with a tremendous moral cost:benefit price
Can't say I agree, but I grew up shooting so I never really had the thought. Just practice the four basic fundamentals and they're never dangerous to you or people you care about.
If you want to use it, then use it! In fact, use it even if you don't want to so you may build and maintain skill. I have a shitload of guns, but they're all primarily for fun, and I won't lie to myself of others about that. Yeah, they're also for protection or SHTF, but that's all secondary.
If anything, getting my CCL made me much less confrontational as a person because I really don't want to deal with the legal hassle. The adage "an armed society is a polite society" is correct, at least for me.
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