The sinus swabs will make it easier for them to pull your brain out of your skull via your nose like the Egyptians would do prior to mummification. This way, when you die, they can pull your brain out for study prior to making you one of the living dead in their zombie apocalypse. With the brain gone, head shots won't work as a defense. They'll just keep coming. The anal swabs work the same way, but it allows them to pull your heart out of your ass.