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687

(post is archived)

[–] • 6 pts (edited )

"DILDO!" I blurted out loud to myself, sitting alone in the drivers seat of my Prius.

[–] • 2 pts

I can see you sitting in a corner embracing your dildo trying not to cry. Just like I had to do last Christmas at my inlaws house.

[–] • 1 pt

Unfortunately, this sudden loud outburst woke that weird smelly clown who had been sleeping in the backseat.

[–] • 3 pts

The last time I felt this way I ended up crying by myself. Good thing I brought my

Gas mask.

The wafts of mustard gas kept blowing over the trenches, never to the point that my skin got the burning, pussing sore they had before, but my eyes...

They stinged with the slightest whiff of that shit. And inhaling that was even worse.

That putrid gas, it was like the flames of hell on your lungs and nose. Made me feel happy that the open, rotting blisters on my feet only hurt when I used them to walk. Or stand.

Still better than crying from the gas.

[–] • 2 pts

grasp of objective truth. Oh no, I’m still crying because that’s why I was crying before.

[–] • 0 pt

I can't be the reason for my own sadness. My parents ghosts enter the room only for me to

[–] • 2 pts

axe so I can charge into battle and spill the blood of my enemies.

[–] • 0 pt

Dumbbells or you're gay

[–] • 0 pt

copy of mein kampf. Good sir, I apologize my family was lied to by the jews and fought on the wrong side. Now we must have equality for all as the niggers will never have an IQ above luck warm water.

[–] • 0 pt

Toothbrush. Shouldnt go to a funeral with bad breath.