Could just be a savings for college or retirement or rainy day? Ask and I'm willing to bet she will tell you
Could just be a savings for college or retirement or rainy day? Ask and I'm willing to bet she will tell you
Not gonna lie, if my wife did this I would be super pissed. Not because she did it, but because she didnt tell me. 100% communication is what is required for a healthy relationship. Already you have formed doubts because this rule was broken. Two must become one. However, she may be preparing fpr a suprise present or similar. This would make me double pissed PERSONNALY. I hate suprises and wasted money on this scale.
Not gonna lie, if my wife did this I would be super pissed. Not because she did it, but because she didnt tell me. 100% communication is what is required for a healthy relationship. Already you have formed doubts because this rule was broken. Two must become one. However, she may be preparing fpr a suprise present or similar. This would make me double pissed PERSONNALY. I hate suprises and wasted money on this scale.
I doubt it’s for a gift there was 4300 in there on my birthday, I checked.
I am upset. Just thinking through my next move.
I doubt it’s for a gift there was 4300 in there on my birthday, I checked.
I am upset. Just thinking through my next move.
Who was the greater witness in your marriage? The state, friends or God?
Who was the greater witness in your marriage? The state, friends or God?
For me, God
Really tho we eloped in Reno NV for 50 bucks cause no one approved of our union (cheesy as fuck but the truth)
For me, God
Really tho we eloped in Reno NV for 50 bucks cause no one approved of our union (cheesy as fuck but the truth)
Yever just honched down on a barrel and been like that's "nigger justice?" Only if you sucked them off first. I understand you? Nah.
Yever just honched down on a barrel and been like that's "nigger justice?" Only if you sucked them off first. I understand you? Nah.
Are you serious faggot? Sounds like your greatest witness was ego.
Are you serious faggot? Sounds like your greatest witness was ego.
Do you actually have a relationship with your wife that has 100% trust?
If you do, I am extremely envious of your relationship.
I trust exactly one person 100%, and maybe that is sad, but I feel like it is realistic.
Do you actually have a relationship with your wife that has 100% trust?
If you do, I am extremely envious of your relationship.
I trust exactly one person 100%, and maybe that is sad, but I feel like it is realistic.
100% communication yes, 100% trust no. I don't trust her with things such as ensuring she follows the level of detail I try to put down in regards to caring for our animals. In the same way I hope she doesn't trust me to ensure I take care of our children properly because babies are shit and very annoying.
100% communication yes, 100% trust no. I don't trust her with things such as ensuring she follows the level of detail I try to put down in regards to caring for our animals. In the same way I hope she doesn't trust me to ensure I take care of our children properly because babies are shit and very annoying.
Is that person You?
Is that person You?
You don't own a shovel? J/k obviously.
Sometimes shit is what it is, be direct and see if there's something you can do to fix it before you throw it all away. Ten years is already way more than a tenth of our lives if we're being honest w/ ourselves.
Ya can't fix it then it just is what it is. More often than not the things you dislike about your partner don't outweigh the good shit they do for others. Life's complicated like that. W/ 5 kids... you got a lot on your mind. Just think it through.
You don't own a shovel? J/k obviously.
Sometimes shit is what it is, be direct and see if there's something you can do to fix it before you throw it all away. Ten years is already way more than a tenth of our lives if we're being honest w/ ourselves.
Ya can't fix it then it just is what it is. More often than not the things you dislike about your partner don't outweigh the good shit they do for others. Life's complicated like that. W/ 5 kids... you got a lot on your mind. Just think it through.
Thanks
Thanks
I did this after my card was declined for the fifth time , we made plenty of money but my wife can’t manage it now I have a cushion account.
I did this after my card was declined for the fifth time , we made plenty of money but my wife can’t manage it now I have a cushion account.
My husband did this. He is the bread maker of the family and pays all the bills, so super easy for him to do it. Kept the stash in the safe, which I generally don’t look into either. When he had squired away over ten grand, he told me and showed me and said it was our when the shtf stash. Not saying this is what she’s doing, but just wanted to say it’s not necessarily nefarious.
My husband did this. He is the bread maker of the family and pays all the bills, so super easy for him to do it. Kept the stash in the safe, which I generally don’t look into either. When he had squired away over ten grand, he told me and showed me and said it was our when the shtf stash. Not saying this is what she’s doing, but just wanted to say it’s not necessarily nefarious.
She's obviously cooking meth on the side.
She's obviously cooking meth on the side.
twirl twirl twirl FUCK YOUR BURNING IT!!
*twirl twirl twirl* FUCK YOUR BURNING IT!!
How did you find out?
How did you find out?
There was a piece of paper stuffed in some receipts. It had a bank name, log in and password on it and I thought “hmmmm we don’t use this bank?”
I logged in but it was locked by multi factor authentication (send code via text BS) When she got home from work and took a shower I got the code from her phone and logged in.
There was a piece of paper stuffed in some receipts. It had a bank name, log in and password on it and I thought “hmmmm we don’t use this bank?”
I logged in but it was locked by multi factor authentication (send code via text BS) When she got home from work and took a shower I got the code from her phone and logged in.
You might ask her about what account this paper you found is for and go from there.
idk if you want to get into how you know how much is in the account since you'd have to fess up to accessing her phone etc.
You might ask her about what account this paper you found is for and go from there.
idk if you want to get into how you know how much is in the account since you'd have to fess up to accessing her phone etc.
This is a good way to go about it.
This is a good way to go about it.
Unless the source and/or use of the money is suspect, I wouldn't worry too much about it, unless you had a prior agreement to share finances/financial knowledge.
Did she break a specific prior agreement you had by having this bank account?
Regardless, I would let her know that you found out, and ask her why she had this account.
Unless the source and/or use of the money is suspect, I wouldn't worry too much about it, unless you had a prior agreement to share finances/financial knowledge.
Did she break a specific prior agreement you had by having this bank account?
Regardless, I would let her know that you found out, and ask her why she had this account.
Nothing out of the ordinary except a rather substantial amount and she has been telling me for years she doesn’t have money for this or that. I briefly glanced through the last couple months spending and don’t see anything strange. Just stingy is what I’m hoping.
Nothing out of the ordinary except a rather substantial amount and she has been telling me for years she doesn’t have money for this or that. I briefly glanced through the last couple months spending and don’t see anything strange. Just stingy is what I’m hoping.
I cannot and will not presume to know what your marriage is like.
But women, specifically most mother's, love their children more than anything else.
If you love something, you have to plan to take care of it no matter what, even if things don't go according to plan.
It's why people buy insurance on houses, cars, and even spouses.
Nobody plans on having their house burn down, but is does happen.
Things are probably fine with you and your marriage, but what if you left her or got arrested for treason and all your assets were seized? She'd need something to take care of the kids with.
She'd be a worse mother if she didn't have an emergency nest egg nobody knew about.
In other words, your five children are cucking you, causing your wife to choose them over you.
So you have to sit down and have an honest conversation with your wife. Tell her it's you or the kids. She has to choose, she can't have both.
If she chooses the kids, great, she has 5,000$ in a secret bank account to take care of them for the rest of their lives.
If she chooses you, I'm pretty certain you can anonymously drop off children at hospitals and fire stations, no questions asked.
Good luck, I wish you the best.
-Theo
I cannot and will not presume to know what your marriage is like.
But women, specifically most mother's, love their children more than anything else.
If you love something, you have to plan to take care of it no matter what, even if things don't go according to plan.
It's why people buy insurance on houses, cars, and even spouses.
Nobody plans on having their house burn down, but is does happen.
Things are probably fine with you and your marriage, but what if you left her or got arrested for treason and all your assets were seized? She'd need something to take care of the kids with.
She'd be a worse mother if she didn't have an emergency nest egg nobody knew about.
In other words, your five children are cucking you, causing your wife to choose them over you.
So you have to sit down and have an honest conversation with your wife. Tell her it's you or the kids. She has to choose, she can't have both.
If she chooses the kids, great, she has 5,000$ in a secret bank account to take care of them for the rest of their lives.
If she chooses you, I'm pretty certain you can anonymously drop off children at hospitals and fire stations, no questions asked.
Good luck, I wish you the best.
-Theo
This is the dumbest piece of advice I have ever heard. OP don't so this.
This is the dumbest piece of advice I have ever heard. OP don't so this.
Shit happens man, she could be saving for a gift for you or just in case you don't know until you ask. Be direct and worst case scenario you ruin a surprise that was going to be a big gift. Best case scenario you make your marriage better.
Shit happens man, she could be saving for a gift for you or just in case you don't know until you ask. Be direct and worst case scenario you ruin a surprise that was going to be a big gift. Best case scenario you make your marriage better.
It's probably just extra for emergencies. My husband and I do this to each other all the time. Then when shit hits the fan we ask how much the other has squirreled away.
It's probably just extra for emergencies. My husband and I do this to each other all the time. Then when shit hits the fan we ask how much the other has squirreled away.
Wouldn't you be better off just having a shit fund you both know about and don't touch? Hoping your partner has an unknown amount of money to pull out of their ass doesn't seem like the best way to deal with an unplanned situation.
Wouldn't you be better off just having a shit fund you both know about and don't touch? Hoping your partner has an unknown amount of money to pull out of their ass doesn't seem like the best way to deal with an unplanned situation.
is money something you guys talk about a lot? Is it possible that she is not hiding it as much as didn't think she needed to talk to you about it?
my aunt once lent my parents money without talking to her husband; they got passed that so hopefully you guys can get through this too.
I think the best thing to do is say how you found out and ask her about it.
is money something you guys talk about a lot? Is it possible that she is not hiding it as much as didn't think she needed to talk to you about it?
my aunt once lent my parents money without talking to her husband; they got passed that so hopefully you guys can get through this too.
I think the best thing to do is say how you found out and ask her about it.
She is always looking at the bank account. Always asking if I paid this or that; after everything’s paid always ask if I’d have extra money and if I do what I’m planning for it... (I’m never late or haven’t been in anytime I can remember since we’ve been married) Now I think I no why; she’s trying to see if I’m doing what she’s been doing all along.
Projection every time.
She is always looking at the bank account. Always asking if I paid this or that; after everything’s paid always ask if I’d have extra money and if I do what I’m planning for it... (I’m never late or haven’t been in anytime I can remember since we’ve been married) Now I think I no why; she’s trying to see if I’m doing what she’s been doing all along.
Projection every time.
Next time she pesters you about having paid the bills, say "nah, just pay that bill from your account okay, thanks."
Next time she pesters you about having paid the bills, say "nah, just pay that bill from your account okay, thanks."
I have been thinking about this. Doing the next mortgage payment or some other large one
I have been thinking about this. Doing the next mortgage payment or some other large one
I wouldn't be to harsh man, you sound like your in it and pissed. I'd cool off before approaching the situation.
I wouldn't be to harsh man, you sound like your in it and pissed. I'd cool off before approaching the situation.
Agreed. I’m trying to give it a week and just think about it all.
Agreed. I’m trying to give it a week and just think about it all.
sounds like. did she grow up without money or have you guys been in a bad spot financially before? could it be a control thing so you guys don't end up in a bad spot? I hope it's just something like that but even if it is that is something that should have been discussed with you. good luck with that conversation, if your a praying man pray before you bring it up.
sounds like. did she grow up without money or have you guys been in a bad spot financially before? could it be a control thing so you guys don't end up in a bad spot? I hope it's just something like that but even if it is that is something that should have been discussed with you. good luck with that conversation, if your a praying man pray before you bring it up.
She came from a very very poor family and I’ve thought this might be part of it too...
I’ve always kept thing paid and been employed since we’ve been together as far as I can recall. I had a little credit card debt but that was paid off 4 or so years ago.
She came from a very very poor family and I’ve thought this might be part of it too...
I’ve always kept thing paid and been employed since we’ve been together as far as I can recall. I had a little credit card debt but that was paid off 4 or so years ago.
(post is archived)