All these scary drugged out looking homeless faggots kept on sucking my dick in the public park. I tried to run away without paying then, but I slipped on an Indian Google Engineer's feces while darting down a dark alley. I was promptly ran over by three drag queens coming home from Story Hour on electric rentable scooters. Luckily, it didn't hurt at all, as being run over had crushed discarded heroin needles into my arms, resulting in a natural sort of pain killing effect. I naturally stumbled into a Starbucks bathroom to dispose of the needles, and maybe nod-off for the next few hours. However, I ended up falling into the counter, and began to choke on my own vomit. Luckily, there was a doctor there, and zhe started to perform a tracheostomy. As zhe cut open my airway, zhe asked the staff for a plastic straw to insert into the opening, but unfortunately they only has paper straws. Zhe tried zhis best, but I ended up losing braincells because I went 15 minutes without oxygen. That's when I decided to post on this retarded forum.