As I left the gate of my flight into San Francisco, I realized how tired I was. I took my girlfriend by the hand and walked her to a Starbucks, where I ordered a latté.
"I'm sorry sir, we are out of milk. Could I get you a soy latté instead?"
I was in a rush, so I said ok.
I took a sip of the dark black coffee with pure ivory soy swirling into it, and immediately felt the potent phyto-estrogens hit my bloodstream.
Suddenly, I had an extreme urge to go play a Nintendo switch, and watch my girlfriend be liberated sexually by having her need met by other, darker men.
"I have to go to the men's bathroom" I said.
"Oh, you have to pee again?"
"YEAH! That's the only reason anyone would go to a public men's bathroom in San Francisco, right?"
>"YEAH! That's the only reason anyone would go to a public men's bathroom in San Francisco, right?"
Good lord. You went to a public bathroom in SF...Don't you know that's why BART smells like piss? That's so people don't catch AIDS in the restrooms.
But hey, at least you're didn't go home gay.
(post is archived)