My daughter just took an empty wine bottle from the coffee table and tried to smash it on the end.

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I'm so proud of her. Also glad I have a hard wooden table.

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[–] • 1 pt

Ooh!! May I?!

*fondles your table, disturbingly

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[–] [deleted] • 0 pt

Im sure it would be pleased. A nice change from being smashed with shit and drooled all over

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[–] • 0 pt

Smashed with shit?!

You need to explore alternate culinary pursuits, my friend. Excrement has no place on any table!

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[–] [deleted] • 0 pt

Oh you know, weve all eaten shit some times in our lives

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/s/Whatever

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