Jesus... I hope you get to live a long and happy life with your family.
Have you gotten any help dealing with this stuff?
There isn't any help i would get that is going to help with it.....unless she admits it.
Which she won't, and when she is gone....well that is that, and I honestly think I will then. She can't lie to me or herself anymore.
She will listen. It sounds stupid I know, but it is what I got....and that will be enough.
I got one more for you.
Winter 1986 and transformers was in full swing boi.
Was xmas and my dad (real dad) got me a present....I kept begging and step dad let me open it.
Was star scream pjs man....had the decepticon purple, and the logo...even had those slippers that go over your feet.
Was awesome AF as I was 7yo and on cloud 9. Called up dad and told him how cool they were and had mom take a picture of me...a Polaroid.
She had it last time I saw her too and she showed it to me....it hurt and you will see why in a bit.
So after the call they said clean the mess up....I said ok and picked up the newspaper wrapping as dad uses the comics section to this day with presents when he wraps them. Except for me. He doesn't do that anymore.
I picked up the box from Tg&Y the pjs were in and went to put it in the burn barrel...had to use the pool ladder to get up high enough to smash it down because I wasn't allowed to burn the stuff.
So after I was done I walked back in my tracks as it had snowed. And I didn't want to get wet.
Got to the door and it was locked...so I knocked and I knocked...no answer. Well we lived in a trailer house and the porch was long enough that I peeked in the window thinking it was a game.
Sneaking my head closer and closer, but they were watching TV...I raised my voice and no answer....day turned to dusk and I stayed there on the porch.....
I was crying at one point and my dog Sadie...big ass orange chow my dad got me when I was born was there....snow on her nose and she lurped me with that big black tounge.
I told her I didn't know what was happening...she scooted me to her dog house and got in my way so I could only get in there with her.
I laid down with her as I did often....crying and telling her what happened...expecting an answer from her...she just kept licking me with that tounge.
I fell asleep at some point and was woken up when step dad had grabbed me by my leg and pulled me out of her house.
He put me on the ground in front of him and slapped me so hard I tasted blood. Told me if I wanted to be an animal then I can be.
Well Sadie didn't like that....she bit the fuck out of his hand and then got between he and I. Growling the fuck around and find out...she had her chain as tight as it would go too.
He looked at me and then the dog, and walked back inside. Sadie gave me one last kiss....and looked at me as she knew what he was going to do.
He came back out and shot her in the head...she dropped in my lap...tounge rolled out of her head no love left in her.
Her feet twitched a few times and I screamed and screamed....I held her head and put my tiny hand over the entry wound trying to keep the blood in there but it was so much.
He spit on her and me...said something and got in his truck to leave....my mother came out and yelled at me for getting blood all over my new clothes....hitting me in the face and screaming she had to buy new ones so my dad didn't see it.
That was my worse day and why I dont like xmas and prefer Thanksgiving
DUDE, YOU HAVE TO GET OVER HER ADMITTING ANY FUCKING THING!
She’s fucking crazy. You can’t reason with crazy. You keep expecting things from her that will never happen. You are holding you back at this point.
Holy shit. I know you said you don't want pity but I'm so sorry that happened to you and poor Sadie. Fuck these people.
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