>Didn’t know she was struggling till she lost. I'm so sorry. My mother *threatened* (and occasionally attempted) suicide throughout my entire childhood. Borderline personality disorder is her working diagnosis. For 20-30 years all of her children lived in a constant state of fear and guilt and then, all at once, we got fed up and exhausted. She's still alive but nobody but my father jumps for her mental breakdowns anymore. I can't even imagine what a mind fuck a mother's suicide out of the blue without warning would feel like. I am so so sorry.