Please inform your wife and children that Uncle Theo is moving in, and that he really doesn't like it when you touch his stuff or make direct eye contact.
Uncle Theo has problems he'd rather not talk about.
Uncle Theo is a great guy. He pointed me down a long, dark alleyway recently and stabbed me for half a pack of Maverick Menthol 100s. It was a long con tbh, only stabbed me after a few years.
Took me a few years, but damn, was it worth it.
Will do, however I am a very aggressive cuddler.
I feel you. I am a very aggressive stabber when unexpectedly woken up.
Just a holdover from years of prison.
Other than that, I should get along with the entire family!
Well then you just are not going to be allowed to have any knives in the house. I'm sorry this is just something we are going to have to insist on.
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