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216

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[–] 5 pts

Close your eyes. It sounds like a dog trying to bite the water jet off of a slow sprinkler.

[–] 1 pt

That, or a bulldog in flip-flops out for a run.

[–] 1 pt

Don't watch old Matt Stonie's food challenges with eyes closed.

His brother holding the camera is pretty much always moaning while watching him downing pounds of food in minutes. It's disgusting.

[–] 2 pts

Haha! Well, that advice went sorely unheeded. Gonna go scrub out my ear now.

[–] 3 pts

As long as he's doing this they can't jab him

[–] 3 pts

Unless they have tranquilizer guns and load them with the clot shot instead.

Good luck penetrating my Kevlar trenchcoat and Vader helmet.

[–] 1 pt

Alex Jones is on another level of reality.

[–] 0 pt

Try that with hamburgers