They forced her to get a haircut? She's more useless than I thought, if she's incapable of refusing to voluntarily go out and get a haircut.
Dear Speaker Pigloser, we're so sorry for setting you up.
Please accept our deepest apologies.
To make amends to you, please accept this free helicopter ride ticket.
Sincerely.
We'll take you on a nice tour of the Pacific coast...
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