Oy vey goyim, are you sick and tired of emails, texts, and phone calls asking you to agree to our monthly subscription plan? We know what monthly subscriptions are best for you, goyim. We, the chosen ones, will decide this for you, and easily hit our quarterly earnings and White depopulation targets. Support the "Harassment Deterrence Act" introduced by your local "representative" so we can take care of all this for you. There will be more time for sportsball and slop this way. Trust us.