I'm missing a significant amount of cartilage between four of my vertebrae. Comes from a major injury back when I was 15 (a lifetime ago) and then playing football and a few other injuries and poor back maintenance. Core strength. That's what you need. If you go to the gym you're likely mostly there. But you need three things. First, sit ups, crunches, oblique work (twists with a bar is great for this). This is all likely obvious. Second, get on the Roman chair. If you gym is decent you'll have one of these there. It's like a sit up thing except you're face down. Your legs are supported and you bend down and up with your upper body. This massively strengthens the muscles in your lower back. I would usually do 20-30 reps (in 2 or 3 sets) every time I went to the gym. Helps a ton. Be careful of doing alternate exercises like standing and working your lower back using weights. Some people can do this, but I posit they already have healthy backs. If your back is already fucked I'd say stay on the lighter side with this sort of thing. The Roman chair is an excellent fix. Third, a good light back brace. I'm wearing one right now since my back is also out. (Working on moving to a new state and lifting a lot of crap on top of not having been to the gym regularly for a while.) You can find these on Amazon and it's amazing how much they help. Mine was like $30. It's a slightly flexible band of thick fabric which velcros in the front. Suck in the stomach and wrap it around and stick it in place. But then it has two more very stretchy bands what pull toward the front and velcro, thus tightening it. I'm sitting here for my morning meeting wearing it over basically pajama pants (I work from home) and it's fine and comfortable. Finally, relax. Really. Maybe your back is tied to mental stress. Maybe not. Doesn't hurt to relax the brain. But relax the body. Lay flat as much as you can. If it's really really bad I'll pop an oxycodone and kiss off a day. Haven't had to do that in a long while as the back brace and basic care keep things mostly in line. Good luck man. I feel your pain (I've been to the ER twice for this shit). I'll probably need surgery one day. Not looking forward to that.