I've lost many that were very close. Unless he left a note, on paper or on his technology, there is no way for you to know why.
My aunt did it, left no note, OD. But we all knew why, health issues. I had an old friend from high school do it, no note, was facing divorce. Same with another guy I knew, only he did it in the living room, in front of the whole family as a little fuck you to his wife and daughter.
As far as the burial, it really doesn't matter what the sister wants. The only thing that does matter is what he wanted. Did you ever talk about it in the past?
When I buried my old lady of 15 years, the funeral came out to about 11k. Do you, or her, have good credit? Get a loan.
I wish I had comforting words for you brother. It is the absolute worst when you lose someone close. Mine all come visit me in my sleep not long after. Those aren't just dreams, contrary to what some would have you believe. Ask him what you want to know, if you remember. Stay off drugs and drink for awhile, these will interfere with the visit.
You will also hear people say they are sorry, they feel for you, blah, blah, bullshit to make themselves feel better. Fact is, when it comes to losing people you have a strong bond with, you don't know, you can't relate, unless you have been in that place that I can only describe as utter despair from that kind of a loss.
In that place you learn something. People will sometimes say, we would argue over little things. The most important thing I learned in my voyages to that place is, THERE ARE NO LITTLE THINGS!
That's all I got for you. I'll lift a gless in your boy's honor tonight.
Peace brother.
Mine all come visit me in my sleep not long after. Those aren't just dreams, contrary to what some would have you believe.
That is actually comforting. I'm glad I'm not the only one to experience it. It hasn't happened yet with my buddy, but my last conversation was with my dad in a dream. Sitting on his porch enjoying coffee. I was at the lowest I had ever felt in my life until he invited me to the porch for coffee.
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