I believe in God 100%, I just cannot believe that he is Good. There is too much weird, Evil shit going on. I always have this weird feeling something is playing a trick on me and wants everyone to suffer. I do not want consciousness and reject the premise that Free Will is a gift. The act of Creation strikes me as intrinsically Evil. I don't trust any of it.
The one who is trying to play a trick on everyone and wants us all to suffer is the devil. He's wants everyone to go down with him, since he has been condemned.
God is good, He does have a plan. Just realize all this weird and evil stuff you're seeing is in "babylon", so to speak. You find it in places that aren't living in accordance with God's design. In places like America it's pretty much everywhere, because the nation itself is run by devil worshippers. You can always find good, God fear people and communities. In those places, you get a glimpse of what God's intended design is.
God has helped me out throughout my life, whenever I actually seek His help. In my experience, He is a good guy.
I find your words comforting, but I still don't get how a Righteous God could let this place exist.
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