1 NEVER hire a lawyer, lawyers are for fags everybody knows this 2 When you meet the judge for the first time without your lawyer, don't try to be nice because the judge will think you're a faggot trying to pass as a real man by not hiring a lawyer. So first thing you do, you cut him and tell him to shut the fuck up, at the very moment he opens his mouth, he then is going to play with a little wooden hammer to try to divert your attention, it's a shit-test and most people fall for it, don't stop or you'll lose the judge's respect, you have to yell at him like a drill instructor, call him a fucking piece of shit nigger until he shuts the fuck up. If you succeed, he'll send guards at you to test your octogon skills, no holds barred, you have to wreck the shit out of the guards, eye poking, kicks to the groin, everything goes, you can use the furniture too. Make no mistake it's not a sport, it's a deathmatch, and if you win, the judge will sentence you to life without parole, which basically means that you're granted a life long free pass for any crime you want, no question asked, that's what "without parole" means Sure, said like that it sounds tough, but everybody can do it, you just have to be prepared, everything is in the preparation, 10 to 15 pushups a day for a week or so, and you should be good