Hello Mr. Thompson. As you know there are conflicts ongoing with Russia, Iran and China, and Congress has instituted the draft. You are hereby ordered to active duty in the US Army.
ahem, “niggers”
I'm sorry sir but that kind of extremism isn't tolerated in the Army, you are hereby disqualified from all military service.
Accuse the recruiter of molesting you years before and start panicking and fake crying, yelling for help while asking people to call 911 and curling up into a ball in the corner fake crying, mumbling about sexual assault and his penis.
This would probably work pretty well.
They would just try to feed you to the wolves if you made yourself undesirable. I'm not recommending you play ball of course.. just pointing out that a slur will not be enough for them to go away.
I'm sorry sir but that kind of extremism isn't tolerated in the Army, you are hereby sentenced to a prison term in a wakandan prison of not less than 5 years. You will be issued some vasiline and a suicide kit in the next room.
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