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My brother is 2 years older than me . he always been an asshole but we've had our positive moments . like when i saved him from falling out of a window by barring his legs inside of a sill , or when i stood sideways i grabbed his arm to pull his head out of river on a white water rafting trip , or when i didnt kill him after he shoved my neck into the hood of my car after jumping his battery over i dont know why . he has a 100k/yr job running medical lab tests and just bought a new car . 14 months ago his best freind got into a car wreck and didnt go to the doctor , died from internal bleeding 2 days later bro found him dead on the couch , he was a persistant felon that spent most of his life in prison .. 6 months ago he came home to his girlfriend od'd on the couch . he got her onto heroin and she had a bad reaction and didnt want to go to the hospital because they would see the tract marks on her arm . he's horribly depressed but he made this hell for himself . recently he's been staying at our parents while working a contract , he got drunk and did drugs and wrecked his new car and tried to run from the police during the sobriety check . apparently he completely lost his composure with my parents today and is suicidal. he has had so many chances . should i suggest to my parents (70+ yrs) that they need a restraining order or can i get one on their behalf ?

My brother is 2 years older than me . he always been an asshole but we've had our positive moments . like when i saved him from falling out of a window by barring his legs inside of a sill , or when i stood sideways i grabbed his arm to pull his head out of river on a white water rafting trip , or when i didnt kill him after he shoved my neck into the hood of my car after jumping his battery over i dont know why . he has a 100k/yr job running medical lab tests and just bought a new car . 14 months ago his best freind got into a car wreck and didnt go to the doctor , died from internal bleeding 2 days later bro found him dead on the couch , he was a persistant felon that spent most of his life in prison .. 6 months ago he came home to his girlfriend od'd on the couch . he got her onto heroin and she had a bad reaction and didnt want to go to the hospital because they would see the tract marks on her arm . he's horribly depressed but he made this hell for himself . recently he's been staying at our parents while working a contract , he got drunk and did drugs and wrecked his new car and tried to run from the police during the sobriety check . apparently he completely lost his composure with my parents today and is suicidal. he has had so many chances . should i suggest to my parents (70+ yrs) that they need a restraining order or can i get one on their behalf ?

(post is archived)

[–] • 7 pts

He won't ever change as long as he has enablers like your family to fall back on. If you don't completely remove him from your lives for 5 years until he seriously changes then whatever happens is on you. He's given you plenty of warnings. Don't ignore them.

[–] [deleted] • 3 pts

Sounds like he needs 10 days in rehab to start and then go from there.

[–] • 1 pt

Well his recent f'ing his car and running from cops still hasnt gone to court yet , my mom paid his 30K bail . I just caouldn't live with myself he he hurts anyone else in the course of his own demise . He is my Mom's son and I understand the difficulty in turning your back to your child , but ffs , acting like a child when in youre in your 40s screaming at your Mom you're going to killyourself and you want to die . 5th of vodka , Id say H but I dont know , ketamine , i dont even know what he does .

[–] • 2 pts

I understand where you’re coming from, but he needs to go to rehab before you do anything. The ups and downs that come from drugs mess with your mind and will make you temporary insane. Not necessarily in a schizophrenic way, but emotionally. Try to get him detoxed and then have a conversation with him and see where it goes from there

[–] • 1 pt

She paid that much bail to get her baby boy out of that howibble pwace? Yeah, he's fucked. Your mom's going to enable him to death, and I'm not sure there's much you can do about it.

[–] • 1 pt

Yeah I dont know how any of that works ; she'll get her bail back when he goes to court right ?

[+] [deleted] • 2 pts
[–] • 1 pt

Intervention with whole family and an addiction specialist mediator. He either agrees to get help, goes in to rehab and stays clean or the family commits him and he’s out on his ass. Tough love.

[–] • 1 pt

Well he went to hospital last night for a psych eval . Did not agree to stay so he went back to my parents and got his car ( which I'm shocked stick ran ) left for a while and then came back at 2 AM , slept for a while and then went back to his condo in another state . Ive got a feeling in my bones I'll never see him again .

[–] • 1 pt

Hard situation. I’ve been through some hairy family situations too. They didn’t all end well, but I got through them. You can too. I wish you the best of luck

[–] • 1 pt

Send that nig to the looney bin on a 48 hr hold then have a serious convo with your parents. Maybe they will listen. Sounds like dude needs rehab and jesus

[–] • 1 pt

Sounds like giving your brother a list of the tallest buildings in the area with public access would be a better idea.

[–] • 1 pt

My sisters and brothers wrote him off years ago .

[–] [deleted] • 1 pt

I've dealt with the police. Believe me, the police won't help you. Restraining orders are absolutely worthless.

[–] • 1 pt

Ugh boomer parents. Mothers can be far worse than abusive fathers with endless enabling. It sounds like she wears the pants and your father just goes along with it.

Without writing a novel on this it comes down to education. Everyone involved needs to become a competent psychologist or get the fuck out of the way completely, this includes your brother. More to the point your brother needs to want to get better and to make it worse it sounds like he's still well into that phase where it all seems hopeless and doomed no matter what he does. The best thing for this is usually a detox from drugs but also environment. As an example, but likely unrealistic,... Stick him on a plantation/farm in some third world country where living requires a full day full of chores like chopping wood, butchering and cooking. The work help distract the mind and makes the days shorter. He'd be completely removed from online and any "friends" he has that are just as fucked up as he is. The people there will be much healthier as an influence for him and will give him a better status quo to try and adapt to. A situation like that would help him get a better perspective on what's actually possible for him and what he can look forward to.

It's a long road and unfortunately most people in his life, yourself included, will only make it worse while trying to make it better.

[–] [deleted] • 0 pt

Stick him on a plantation/farm in some third world country where living requires a full day full of chores like chopping wood, butchering and cooking.

I could use one of these... as a vacation.

[–] • -1 pt

Are you guys niggers, by chance?

[–] • 0 pt

No we are white and both racist , but he always listened to rap , which I never got .

[–] • -1 pt

No. You sound like you're the asshole here and are seriously exaggerating the stories that glorify you.

[–] • -1 pt

found the imposter