Humans are a bundle of desires, or faculties. Both good and bad ones. Meaning simply that we lust after things (both good and bad). And when we desire things inordinately, then the desire becomes sinful. Whether the desires are good or bad, it doesn't matter, when it becomes all consuming it becomes problematic. Because it causes a combustion in the soul, confusion, disarray. It can make more important matters become secondary to the lust, thus causing us to neglect duties. Men and women both desire and lust. And when men and women don't agree on one or other particular desire (the man wants a motorcycle, the woman wants to watch soap operas, whatever) then arguing ensues. Much of the time it has to do with money. This is why a woman is to be in subjection to her husband (as the scriptures explain) when they disagree. Somebody has to be in charge. The buck has to stop somewhere. If a wife desires something that the husband simply cannot get behind (after he hears her out completely, in love), then she must obey. This has nothing to do with intrinsic value, or worth. It is simply for order, it is the divine order, to avoid confusion. 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. Yes of course the teaching has to be qualified. (The husband is a drunk, he beats his wife, he's lazy, he mismanages money. The wife is a sluggard, won't keep the house, is cranky and a smart mouth.) But that's another time, another lesson (not from me, from the scriptures and the sound men who expound them). Because we are sinners, and born in sin (and need redemption), life has become difficult, and nothing works as originally planned - we botch everything. As one has said, "Sin has robbed us of everything." Perfection will not be found this side of eternity. So we must struggle with a constant state of righting wrongs, learning from mistakes, doing the best we can.