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So i dont even know what she is, since my wife died, im guessing its still an ex MIL. Anyways, it feels so frustrating trying to work with her on anything. I've been helping her with my wife's grave, and even that has become aggravating. Apparently it's been 3 years and these people did absolutely nothing for the grave, like absolutely nothing. The place looks like an abandoned waste land right now. So i thought, ok, i guess I'll do it myself. And now she has the balls to fucking insult me and tell me im an asshole. I originally left because these people were being abraesive assholes, the type who expect everything to be handed to them. My wife's mom even "skipped" the funeral because she wanted to go dancing with her friends instead, and yet she complains about me not being proactive enough, even though im setting up all the forms and coordination for unfucking everything she did. On top of this, I am now responsible for litigation against some company she worked for, because these people are so fucking lazy, they want someone else to do the heavy lifting for them, even though they were the ones who initiated the entire grave marker. But now, all of a sudden, Im responsible for their litigation problems. It's like, is there fucking ANYTHING you can do right now? From my POV, everyone in that family comes off as horribly entitled (they are Asian, hence my deep hatred for Asians nowadays), trying to literally stab you in the back at every turn

So i dont even know what she is, since my wife died, im guessing its still an ex MIL. Anyways, it feels so frustrating trying to work with her on anything. I've been helping her with my wife's grave, and even that has become aggravating. Apparently it's been 3 years and these people did absolutely nothing for the grave, like absolutely nothing. The place looks like an abandoned waste land right now. So i thought, ok, i guess I'll do it myself. And now she has the balls to fucking insult me and tell me im an asshole. I originally left because these people were being abraesive assholes, the type who expect everything to be handed to them. My wife's mom even "skipped" the funeral because she wanted to go dancing with her friends instead, and yet she complains about me not being proactive enough, even though im setting up all the forms and coordination for unfucking everything she did. On top of this, I am now responsible for litigation against some company she worked for, because these people are so fucking lazy, they want someone else to do the heavy lifting for them, even though they were the ones who initiated the entire grave marker. But now, all of a sudden, Im responsible for their litigation problems. It's like, is there fucking ANYTHING you can do right now? From my POV, everyone in that family comes off as horribly entitled (they are Asian, hence my deep hatred for Asians nowadays), trying to literally stab you in the back at every turn

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[–] • 1 pt

For now, im gonna maintain contact until the grave is finished and then ghost them ... again. I had originally ghosted them for a few years, and reached out again, thinking i was being too harsh. I remember now why i ghosted them in the first place. But since they own the burial plot, it makes everything more complicated. It's either maintain contact, or lose access to her grave, and that is a supremely shitty decision to force onto someone.

[–] • 0 pt

My wife and I put together our wills and living wills when my father got sick. (It was a wake-up call.) We both want to be cremated and have our ashes spread in places that have meaning to us. Our families were pissed initially (What, no grave???) but realized that the important thing is the memories you have, not the plot of land that no one will visit eventually.

[–] • 1 pt

That cunt of a mom knew this coming in, she essentially tricked everyone into burying her in her own burial plot, using some sob story bullshit. She knew going in, she would have full rights and access and get around spousal kinship laws for that state. At this point, unless i bring my in laws into court over this, the mistake lives on, with minimal recourse from me.

[–] • 0 pt

I was initially unconcerned with what happens to my body after I die but then figured it would be the right thing to do to spell everything out so that my family couldn't give my wife a hard time. If she goes before I do, her side would be a nightmare o she felt the same way. That's also why we sat down and discussed it with them.