I was all about finding an outlet, where I could be FREE of others expectations. Seemed perfect, until FURTHER (non romantic) investigation revealed what I now have as the "reality" of such choices. I'm a worrier, LIKE to be prepared, but it seems, PEOPLE, were the BIGGEST threat and UNKNOWN variable, and I'm not a people person in real life. So that puts the kaibash on that plan, fortunately NOTHING worked out (no job when I SHOULD be boss by now). Meh, then I die, so be it. I KNOW that whatever happens to me, WORSE things have happened to BETTER people.
Being a "worrier" is a good aspect for a captain. You have to b ready for anything, You have to know whatever your crew might have to expect. That is being a good captain.
But now, in clownworld, what does that mean? I wish I could say. I wish I could see reality as it is now.
Maybe I do see, and I just don;t want to. I don't know.
I am in a very suboptimal state to say. At this point, I kind of hope a superintellient AI just wipes out humanitty. My perspective is clouded by things. is It wrong? Possibly. I think I am not worthy as a captain right at this moment,. If my feelings are correct, then it's just the ultimate blackpill right now. I'd rather no one else be infected with this right now.
I would push that big red button right now if it were here.
You and me both (super INTELLIGENT AI (PROPERLY based in fundamental intelligence principles, NOT political perspectives and WISHES and FANTASIES).
I told my friend once when asked, what would you do if you had control over "the button". I said IMMEDIATELY, I'd push it. LONG time ago, Still a child. In tune with the REAL injustices of this world and the intractable nature of FIXING that. Utopia is NOT possible with the CROWD we have now. SOMEBODY has to LOSE. I prefer Biden's team and supporters.
suboptimal is the BEST state sometimes, Can't get there from here sort of situation. Gotta BURN the forest to progress. THen I realize that COULD be in the plans (man or God) already and I'm on the OUTSIDE. So be it. I'm fine with that. HOPING for some FINAL accounting though AFTERWARDS (death). Some comeuppance for those responsible OR reward for the SAME doing the RIGHT thing. I could be RONG, top to bottom, I just use TRUTH and such fundamentals to see things as I do. If that's evil, them I'm evil, and I WANT good to win (even if the lying and fraud and tricks and traps (stuff I hate) IS the preferred method of human advancement (with God).
Amen.
We can only do what we can do.
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