If you think you can remarry someone of child-bearing age and raise more family I think it's a good idea. Otherwise, I would leave it alone.
Edit: Oh, and condolences.
Edit 2: Obviously wait until you're ready regardless.
Yet these assholes talk about all the criminals that got goodified as if they are deities, and they are to the liberal religion. Does your church call them out?
I think the problem can really be summarized by greed masking as religious virtue. It took me so long to understand this, but the church members are incredibly selfish, but mask it by simply claiming religion tolerance and advancement of faith. One of them is time, they seem to suck up as much of it as possible, and not putting your foot down can end up being stuck in multi hour events. At the worst part i was literally doing something every day, which became exhausting after a week.
One of them is time, they seem to suck up as much of it as possible, and not putting your foot down can end up being stuck in multi hour events. At the worst part i was literally doing something every day, which became exhausting after a week.
Man, people keep making comments that I can relate to specific episodes of King of the Hill on this site.
Grieving is a process you have to deal with on your own terms. I have found silent retreats helpful, because every issue has a significant spiritual component.
Maybe if you have a monastery nearby which hosts silent or even guided retreats (a guided retreat is where you meet with a monk once a day to discuss your spiritual progress during the retreat... so you're not going to be talking about your feelings), it might be something to try out. And no, most monasteries do not require one to be a part of that spiritual tradition in order to go on retreat.
Wedding rings are pagan symbols, remove it and destroy it, and if you don't want to remarry, don't marry. In the times we live in, I'm not sure it's a good idea to get married, and things will get worse. And another, doctrinally, you can only marry who has never been married or is no longer physically married, in this case, you either marry a virgin or a widow of only one man in her life, otherwise will configure as adultery and you will go to hell if you commit adultery.
If it’s meant to be, when you meet her, she’ll pull you out of it. Wear the ring if it gives you peace. You’re the one living your life. No one else.
You’re the one living your life. No one else.
This is the advice OP should listen to and take to heart.
1 Timothy 5:1414So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.
Romans 7:1-31Do you not know, brothers and sisters-for I am speaking to those who know the law-that the law has authority over someone only as long as that person lives? 2For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. 3So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man
Sorry to hear about your wife.
If honoring her feels like the right thing to do, and you aren't ready to move on, then don't. Who do your church people think they are in trying to steer your life for you? Don't let others control you or make you feel guilty, even if they think it might be in your best interest. Take their advice, analyze it, and then use your God-given brain to decide for yourself and ignore the naysayers.
Theyre church people. Trying to steer other peoples lives is what they do. Thats their whole purpose. A bird flys, frogs hop, church people tell others how to live.
You are right. My grandfather and my mother are big church people, and behave this way. It's pretty much why I gave up on the church. I still consider myself somewhat of a Protestant, but haven't been to a regular service in decades.
I do find that annoying, maybe they mean it in good spirit or something, but it comes off as horribly insulting to me. I don't want to date, i have the libido of a sloth right now, even if i could somehow get a woman's number, my brain would immediately block and ignore any advances to protect itself from the trauma of having to deal with a potential repeat of what i had to deal with. But instead they harp on the one part of the bible that says be fruitful and multiply, and dont give up on dating. Maybe my grief brain is just frustrated and taking it out on these people, i dont know
You're fine for thinking that way.
You only move at your pace. This is too big of a thing to push.
I hope, in time, you feel yourself well-healed.
Well said
You are, understandably, in a bad place right now and you need time to heal. That's normal, take your time.
They are trying to help you how they can, so just keep that in mind when you brain is telling you how dickish and rude they are. I'm sure you've heard of horror stories of men that fall into depression, booze, and drugs and get ruin. Their bad advices might be coming from a good place.
Take care of yourself (eat well, exercise, etc.) and talk about it and her. Isolation can make things worse. Maybe ask to talk one on one with the priest(?) and let him know that you appreciate the advice to remarry and that it's in the plans, but that at the moment you need to grieve and talk about it. If he can't do that, a psychologist will listen.
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