YOU-CAN-DO-BETTER!!
YOU-CAN-DO-**BETTER!!**
Husband and wife experiment to see what the scene is like:
women have a huge variety of guys to choose from, and have to work very little at it.
guys have a much harder time getting responses, let alone matching with a woman.
women expect way more effort than guys expect of women.
guys are mainly interested in hookups--not getting to know women or care about them personally in the slightest.
guys are way more likely to endure challenges like distance, "it's complicated" type of relationships, and the woman's personal problems for a hookup. women tended to flee at the first sign of drama.
women were x3 as likely to expect a "day date" or casual meeting instead of hooking up.
women's standards of attractiveness just to have a dialogue were far greater than guys' standards for a hookup.
women spent a lot more time "getting to know you" than guys did--about x4 as long.
she could have embarked upon 182 hookups in 2 months if she'd so desired--that works out to 3 a day, every day, for 2 months! my number was only 6.
guys were way more likely to get right down to business and meet in person--usually within 7-8 dialogue exchanges. women asked a lot of questions vetting my personality and what i was actually interested in.
almost 7/10 guys send unsolicited dick pics. only 6 women i talked to agreed to send nudes, and those were standard "half-covered boobs in the mirror" pics.
when i rejected women, they mostly said "oh well" or "that sucks", or some such. after rejecting guys, my wife experienced violent, hateful, or aggressive language about 48% of the time--that's almost half of the guys she talked to.
she got lesbian offers from 4 women, 3 of whom said "they'd never done it but were curious". i received two offers for gay sex.
guys who self-identified as "nice guys" ended up reacting to rejection aggressively or hatefully about twice as often as guys who didn't self-identify that way.
she received 19 rape threats, 2 kidnapping threats, 4 stalking threats, 2 threats to kidnap her kids, and one death threat after rejecting a guy. 3 said things like "i can find out where you live/work and make your life hell".
the takeaway?
dating apps aren't easy for anyone.
not easy to get hookups as a guy....not easy to find a sane, caring guy for women.
not easy to make it as a sincere guy looking for a relationship, as women are extremely wary about your intentions. not easy to find a sincere guy as a woman, because the overwhelming majority of guys are just looking for fast ass...or they're just some kind of psycho.
you can't really blame women for being wary. i mean, look at the numbers. it was scary to see how many guys played it cool, then reacted to rejection aggressively. imagine if that were happening in person?
not sure about the LGBT community, as we didn't include those apps in our sample.
personally, i think dating apps are pretty pointless. the users are completely at cross purposes. you have one group looking for hookups, and the other group looking for the total opposite. and never the twain shall meet.
and at this point in history, dating apps have a nasty reputation for housing liars, crooks, cheaters, deceivers, villains, catfishers, blackguards, dickheads, opportunists, and the rest of the rogue's gallery that populates our ultra-progressive society.
in other words...it's the internet.
my advice? go traditional. meet people in person. at least then you can get a sense of someone's vibe. nothing is certain, but for my money, i'd rather get a sense of people's personality and vibe up close and in real time, rather than rely on how people WANT you to perceive them..how they present themselves is often quite different from how they actually behave in real life.
the best relationships start with chance meetings, and while they're uncommon, they're still very much worth the wait.
don't go looking for love. it doesn't work that way. when you're looking for it, you'll never find it.
as for quick hookups...sure, it happens. but in these cases, it's a "catch as catch can" type of thing. you have to settle for whoever is available and have extremely low standards, whether guy or gal.
personally, i've never in my entire life been desperate enough to have any type of human contact with the women who agreed to a hookup....let alone have sex with them. not necessarily saying they were utterly horrible looking, but descriptions of their situations and their problems and drama, let alone their mediocre appearance...i mean, i've just never been that damn desperate.
women looking for a hookup seem to have it easier, as they have a much bigger pool of candidates to choose from. of course, when you add the risk factor...it sort of balances out.
it seems like hookup culture is a whole lotta work and effort for very little gain. and it seems that the majority of women looking for hookups have some serious life problems going on, and you'd have to be a predator to pursue these vulnerable, hurting people for selfish reasons.
and if you're out there searching for someone with a face like a pornstar and a body like a bikini model, you're gonna be looking for a LONG time. because super sexy guys and girls don't need dating apps--their schedules are already full. no lack of people interested in them.
Husband and wife experiment to see what the scene is like:
1. women have a huge variety of guys to choose from, and have to work very little at it.
2. guys have a much harder time getting responses, let alone matching with a woman.
3. women expect way more effort than guys expect of women.
4. guys are mainly interested in hookups--not getting to know women or care about them personally in the slightest.
5. guys are way more likely to endure challenges like distance, "it's complicated" type of relationships, and the woman's personal problems for a hookup. women tended to flee at the first sign of drama.
6. women were x3 as likely to expect a "day date" or casual meeting instead of hooking up.
7. women's standards of attractiveness just to have a dialogue were far greater than guys' standards for a hookup.
8. women spent a lot more time "getting to know you" than guys did--about x4 as long.
9. she could have embarked upon 182 hookups in 2 months if she'd so desired--that works out to 3 a day, every day, for 2 months! my number was only 6.
10. guys were way more likely to get right down to business and meet in person--usually within 7-8 dialogue exchanges. women asked a lot of questions vetting my personality and what i was actually interested in.
11. almost 7/10 guys send unsolicited dick pics. only 6 women i talked to agreed to send nudes, and those were standard "half-covered boobs in the mirror" pics.
12. when i rejected women, they mostly said "oh well" or "that sucks", or some such. after rejecting guys, my wife experienced violent, hateful, or aggressive language about 48% of the time--that's almost half of the guys she talked to.
13. she got lesbian offers from 4 women, 3 of whom said "they'd never done it but were curious". i received two offers for gay sex.
14. guys who self-identified as "nice guys" ended up reacting to rejection aggressively or hatefully about twice as often as guys who didn't self-identify that way.
15. she received 19 rape threats, 2 kidnapping threats, 4 stalking threats, 2 threats to kidnap her kids, and one death threat after rejecting a guy. 3 said things like "i can find out where you live/work and make your life hell".
the takeaway?
dating apps aren't easy for anyone.
not easy to get hookups as a guy....not easy to find a sane, caring guy for women.
not easy to make it as a sincere guy looking for a relationship, as women are extremely wary about your intentions. not easy to find a sincere guy as a woman, because the overwhelming majority of guys are just looking for fast ass...or they're just some kind of psycho.
you can't really blame women for being wary. i mean, look at the numbers. it was scary to see how many guys played it cool, then reacted to rejection aggressively. imagine if that were happening in person?
not sure about the LGBT community, as we didn't include those apps in our sample.
personally, i think dating apps are pretty pointless. the users are completely at cross purposes. you have one group looking for hookups, and the other group looking for the total opposite. and never the twain shall meet.
and at this point in history, dating apps have a nasty reputation for housing liars, crooks, cheaters, deceivers, villains, catfishers, blackguards, dickheads, opportunists, and the rest of the rogue's gallery that populates our ultra-progressive society.
in other words...it's the internet.
my advice? go traditional. meet people in person. at least then you can get a sense of someone's vibe. nothing is certain, but for my money, i'd rather get a sense of people's personality and vibe up close and in real time, rather than rely on how people WANT you to perceive them..how they present themselves is often quite different from how they actually behave in real life.
the best relationships start with chance meetings, and while they're uncommon, they're still very much worth the wait.
don't go looking for love. it doesn't work that way. when you're looking for it, you'll never find it.
as for quick hookups...sure, it happens. but in these cases, it's a "catch as catch can" type of thing. you have to settle for whoever is available and have extremely low standards, whether guy or gal.
personally, i've never in my entire life been desperate enough to have any type of human contact with the women who agreed to a hookup....let alone have sex with them. not necessarily saying they were utterly horrible looking, but descriptions of their situations and their problems and drama, let alone their mediocre appearance...i mean, i've just never been that damn desperate.
women looking for a hookup seem to have it easier, as they have a much bigger pool of candidates to choose from. of course, when you add the risk factor...it sort of balances out.
it seems like hookup culture is a whole lotta work and effort for very little gain. and it seems that the majority of women looking for hookups have some serious life problems going on, and you'd have to be a predator to pursue these vulnerable, hurting people for selfish reasons.
and if you're out there searching for someone with a face like a pornstar and a body like a bikini model, you're gonna be looking for a LONG time. because super sexy guys and girls don't need dating apps--their schedules are already full. no lack of people interested in them.
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