There's another dark side to this enabling. People who grow up being abused, lied to, and beaten in a dysfunctional family are psychologically marked in their behavior and responses. Many psychotic predators are subconsciously aware of this or even knowingly aware of this dynamic and prey on the vulnerable and needy. Giving them affirmation they desperately need and teaching them to shun the rest of their family, often rightfully so but then take the very place of the abusive family. Such vulnerable people lack the social skills to stand up for themselves as they've historically been primed to submit to abuse and punished for protesting abuse. They are easy targets. All the predator personality has to do is heap them with praise, gifts and compliments and they own them. It all seems wonderful until the victim realizes they are being subsumed by the other person and tries to resist, or leave, and then the relationship can suddenly turn vicious and frightful. It's very hard to get an emotionally abused and weak person to stand up for themselves but it should always be attempted. Sometimes just providing a path of escape and protection with some encouragement is all that's needed. Helping such a victim understand the cues they gave off, how the dynamic developed and how to counteract it is very insightful to the victim but hard for them to accept. Just taking responsibility for their role in enabling an abusive person is difficult to confront. But what ever happens, never let the victim hear you blame them for what happened when they were a child. Children accept the world that's presented to them as they know no other until it's shown to them. They've seen abusive relationships demonstrated and often model their behavior on that demonstration to either become an abuser themselves if they identify with the abuser or become the subject of abuse.